Member Since: January 22, 2013
Answers: 70
Last Update: May 19, 2016
Visitors: 3977
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Theres a guy that was my boyfriend for a year. We ended up breaking up but he is still madly in love with me. I don't really know if i love him but i care about him alot. We are taking a break from talking for a week and it is super hard for him. I feel kind of relieved to have this time to myself. I already show that i don't have loving feelings with him anymore. Whenever i show him that i don't feel right anymore in this situation, he gets super sad and i can't take it; i'm always feeling awful. I don't know how to push myself to stop showing signs of affection. By me staying and pretending to still have feelings for him is confusing him. I feel like i'm playing with his emotions. I need to stop but i don't know how. I really don't want to hurt him, it kills me. Someone please help i'm going insane. (link)
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Something similar happened to me.
Eventually, I cut off all communication with the guy. He blocked my number, we didn't talk on Facebook, we didn't talk when we saw each other in person, etc. This went on for over six months, until he really felt ready and comfortable to talk to me without getting depressed.
It's really hard - it may be harder on you than him. But it is probably best for him not to talk to you. It's easier to get over someone when you do not constantly have to think of them.
That is the ultimate way to stop showing affection, but it needs to be his choice, too. Tell him that you care about him as a friend and you cherish the time you spent together; but you believe that it is in his best interest to take an break from speaking to and seeing you. Ask him if he thinks you're right.
He will probably resist at first, but once you demonstrate that you are really over him and that he has no choice but to move on, he may choose to stop speaking to you for some time.
Good luck!
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Rating: 5
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Thank you for the advice. We are taking time from talking to each other right now. This is all very true.
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