Q: So me and my boyfriend have been going out for 3 years. We've had our off and on moments and a lot of it had to do with drug abuse on his side. I really care about him a lot and would leave when he began doing that but would come back when he had been clean for a while and began talking to me again. He finally seeked help and has been doing good for about 4 months. He got into what he wants to do for his profession and I think its helping him stay clean cause he doesnt feel like a loser. We've been long distance for about 2 years now and live about 5 hours away. We are both 22.
Well he came to visit me this week and it was really good for most of it. I felt bad cause I had to work some nights and since we were gonna ride back home together (we are long distance cause im in college) he didn't have a car. Without a car he was stuck at home. But what he wants to do for a career is on the computer anyways and he said he didn't mind and was just glad to see me. The last day is when we started the horrible argument. Something changed with the stocks (what he wants to do) and he was really antsy to get home and kept asking to leave the day early. I realize now that I should have just said okay, but when he first brought it up...it didn't seem like it really mattered. So I reminded him that we made plans with a friend up there for that night. We ended up fighting the ENTIRE day about it. We would argue, one of us would leave the room and then he would come back and hug me and say he loves me. It was like a cycle. But we ended up really getting angry angry and at one point I said wow we must really hate each other or something. I was in no mood to drive that long in the condition i was in.
Anyways, he ended up breaking up with me and said things like long distance is too hard, there's more bad than good, we have too much baggage, and we are bad for each other. I could not stop crying, and I'm extremely embarrassed to say but it seemed like I kept talking him into staying with me. This went on for like an hour. He said after that that he wanted to give it another try. We slept together that night and this morning. He just kept telling me not to think about it and that he loved me. I tried talking to him about it and saying if he didn't want to stay he shouldn't feel like he has to. But he kept saying he wanted to stay and I just take too much reassurance. Then he texted me tonight saying he loved me but stopped responding when I mentioned how sorry I was.
I just really care about him and my prides a little hurt. I wanted another opinion because I don't want to be bad for him at all. But I also don't want to break up and get back together again. It's too much heartache. So my question is really just your opinions on all of this. Thank you so much for any kind of input :/ I hate feeling this way.
