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hi everybody! well im always depressed i accually almost commited suicide a couple of days ago i quit i cut the line, if you get what i mean… i dont wanna leave my friends and family everbody describes me as a happy person… its all fake im never happy i just try to be for everyone elese someone get me out of this rut...!? i have a great life i dont understand why im so depressed maybe im missing somthing im not sure…

Gotchalk8 has their heart in the right place, but telling people that wanting help means you don't have depression is downright dangerous and very untrue. There is a reason why 'not wanting/asking for help' is not listed as a symptom of depression.

I've had the diagnosis of recurrent clinical depression for several years now, and before I started getting treatment I was desperate for some way out of that horrible darkness, even if it meant killing myself. I was afraid to get help, but that didn't mean I didn't want it. Eventually I did get help, but only after I accidentally revealed everything to my family and they convinced me to see a therapist. It's one of the best things they've ever done for me, and at this point I've learned how to speak up for myself. Now I can tell others when I'm feeling bad, rather than hiding and trying to suffer through it alone.

You do sound like you have clinical depression, and that isn't something you should try to deal with on your own, especially since you just attempted suicide. WebMD has a pretty good list of symptoms that you can look at to see if what you're feeling sounds like depression, but from what you've said it seems pretty clear. Here's the list:
http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/detecting-depression

Although depression is sometimes related to things that happened in your life, there are times when it is purely biological. You could have all the best things happening to you and still be depressed because the problem is in your body. You have no reason to feel guilty just because you have 'no reason to be depressed'. You don't need a reason to be depressed any more than you need a reason to get cancer. It happens sometimes, and when it does we can't control it. But getting help can mean the difference between beating it and dying from it.

From what you've said, it seems like you're in a really bad place right now emotionally. It's nothing to be ashamed of, but you need to ask someone around you for help. Do you have a friend you think would understand, or a parent you trust? If you're still in school, going to your school counselor might be one of your best options. Tell them how you're feeling, tell them you need help, and ask them if they can help you talk to your parents. The school counselor could set up an appointment for all of you to talk about it together.

If you start to feel suicidal again and still can't talk to anyone you know, there is a 24 hour online crisis network for people in situations like yours. The trained volunteers there can help walk you through what you're feeling and find alternatives to suicide. It's called IMAlive, and it's basically like a suicide hotline, but you never have to pick up a phone; everything is done through instant messages. If you need someone to talk to, they are there for you at any time of the day or night. Seriously, please at least talk to someone before attempting suicide again. Here is the link:
https://www.imalive.org/

Things will get better for you, although it may be a long process with plenty of rough patches left. But having dealt with it for several years now, I can say that I'm happy I didn't commit suicide. Right now I am happy with my life, and I've had some great experiences that I would have missed if I'd killed myself. I can even enjoy those great experiences when they happen! It's not impossible for you to get there, too. You will; you just have to keep going. But I really do urge you to ask for help, because there's no way I'd still be here if I kept dealing with it alone, and I don't want you to die in silence like I almost did.

So keep going, get help, and remember that it will most definitely get better someday. And if suffering until that day comes seems too painful, remember that your friends and family would love to help you if they knew you needed it, and it would tear them apart to lose you. You are loved, you are appreciated, and you are needed. Don't ever forget that.

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(Rating: 5) thank so much i feel so much better ! thanks so much the only person who knew about how i felt was my cousin she was like my sister or best friend,... but she died of luekimia a couple of weeks ago.... i dont even know you but thanks soo much! :)
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