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Truly, I have a love for people and an honest desire to see every individual excel and succeed in their personal lives, to shed themselves of as many burdens as possible and enjoy this strange and terrible and wonderful gift that is LIFE
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When I was 12 my mother told me that she didnt know who my father was because she was raped. But there is a name on my birth cirtificate that my mother says is just an old friend who was nice and put his name on for me and I cant find that person anywhere then my mother told me last year when she lived in my house that my father was a nice guy and she only remembered his first name. how did he go from being a rapist to a nice guy who would never hurt her. She even went the extra mile to tell me that he was "afraid" when they had sex because he wanted to make sure she wanted it. How do I tell her that I know that she has been lying to me? How do I get her to tell me the truth? Why do you think she is lying? Why doesnt she think that I deserve to know my father and my children deserve to know their grandfather? I dont care if he wants to be in my life I just want to know if there is health problems I need to worry about. I would love for him to be there in my life but the choice is his. What do I do? Please help (link)
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You should explain to your mother how much her lies are hurting you. Write it down in a letter if it helps you to express it without breaking down. You have a right to know. You are not wrong or crazy for wanting to know. But before you press on any further, please be sure you are ready to know the truth. You know she has lied so far. The real truth might not be any of those things she's already told you. It may be far worse and she feels she is protecting you. So be prepared. If you feel you can be ready for anything, I think you have a right to know. If you can approach her calmly and rationally about it, she may finally understand how much the not knowing hurts you. Good luck.
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