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Member Since: June 9, 2009
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hello.
my name is leah i am 21 years old. i got married at 18 my personal choice so please dont juge. we both meet when i was 15 he was 14.. we feel in love pretty much right away but didnt start dateing right away. but when we did start dateing things where great we where both virgins and had sex 9 months after we started dateing. the sex was great everytime we did it. of corse being that young we did it offten...he asked me to marry him when i was 17 so 2 years in to are relationship. we both always wanted to get married young and i still love him just as much as i did back then. and so does he.
but see now we have been married for 2 years everything is great in a marrage excepted for the sex. hes only 20 this is odd for a man at that age to not want sex. i have a very high sex drive but even im ok to wait a few days to have sex but him he will go weeks with out it...we both dont work so i know hes not cheating on me cuz hes always home. he plays games all the time and i mean all the time from the time he gets up till the time he goes to bed. i just dont get it anymore
i try talking to him about it but he never has anything to say except i donno. i mean even if i come on to him try to get him in the mood he dont even get a bonner he says he gets tinggely feelings but no bonner and still dont want sex. that or he will push me away and say hes not in the mood. i love him so much but this is killing me and just makeing me not want to be with him i cant keep fighting with him about sex its crazy. does anyone have any ideas why hes like this its only been since we got married befor we got married things where great. but after we got married it just got worse and worse and now the last 6-9 months have been really bad like we go weeks now with out it use to just be days...and even if i do things he likes or tell him ill just please him it still dont seem to do nothing...he will only have sex if hes in the mood even if im not in the mood he will keep bugging tell i give in. but i dont belive in pushing a man away for sex unless theres a good reason like ur sick or something so i always say yes to him even if i dont really want to...but if i want to and he dont then its like to bad for me he wont give in even if i begg or try to do things he likes...
does anyone have any ideas why this is happening? or any adivce on things i can do that might spice it up and get him to want it or be more intrested im pretty open minded and will try anything once.
also please dont juge me about being married so young. i doubt me being married so young has anything to do with the sex life. and if he wants to leave me he can i dont stop him nore dose he stop me. we both do really love eachother and like i said everything in are marrage is good except for the sex part. thanks so much
P.S sorry for the speelling im jsut a lil stressed and try to figgure things out plus iv been up for 2 days i cant sleep with this on my mind all the time. (link)
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Neither of you work? Huh? Red flags went up right away when I read that. Sex isn't just physical. Its emotional and psychological. Healthy, happy sex comes when both partners feel fulfilled in other areas of their life. You husband doesn't work. That means he doesn't earn and doesn't provide, and that is a biological need set in EVERY man. He may not even realize it, but its true. Not doing those things can lead to depression and a sense of unworthiness. He's home all the time. That's another problem. He doesn't go out with friends, have hobbies outside of home and is basically in the house with you all day. Its not good for anyone to spend all their time in one spot with one person. I can have a serious emotional affect and it sounds like it is for your husband. If you want things to get better, encourage your husband to find work or decide on what career he would like to pursue and start working toward that. Get him out. Go for walks or sign up for activities in the community.Go out with friends, go places where you can meet new friends. And find another couple that has been married longer to be friends with. Its nice to have people to talk to and hang with who understand the difficulties of marriage and have been through it and can give you good advice. Marriage is work. You're learning that now. But you've made the commitment and you say you love each other, so you can pull through this, but it will take effort on both your parts. That's the truth. Good luck.
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Rating: 5
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thx so much for ur help...but we do go for walks and i do get him out of the house to go see friends. trust me i know thats good for him but most times he dont want to get out of the house. all he wants to do is play games.. but again thx for the help im very greatfull people are doing there best to help and give me info
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