I am an advice hound. I love to give advice, get advice, read advice columns. I love telling people what to do ; D
Truly, I have a love for people and an honest desire to see every individual excel and succeed in their personal lives, to shed themselves of as many burdens as possible and enjoy this strange and terrible and wonderful gift that is LIFE
Location: Los Angeles
Occupation: advice guru and life coach
Member Since: June 9, 2009
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I am a 23 yr old divorced female. I have always been one to be in committed relationships. And now I find myself unable to commit to a man. I tell myself I want a relationship. But the reality of it is I don't.
I lost my father in january 2010 and a few weeks after that my relationship with my boyfriend ended. I loved him with all my heart and still do to this day.
Since then, I have not been the same person. I don't know who I am any more. I hate to admit this but I've become a bit, how do I put it, permiscuous. I find myself not wanting to be with one man. I find myself just havin partners. This isn't me. And I don't know how to change it. I don't know how to get back to the old me. I don't recognize the person I have become. And I sure don't like it either.
Any input would be helpful. I don't know what's going on with me. So any advice or views would be helpful. Thanks. (link)
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You don't want a relationship, but you ARE looking for comfort and love. That search is getting twisted into promiscuity, but the reality is, you're searching for comfort. If counseling is an option for you, seek it out. Either professionally, or through your church/religious organization or the local community center. If not, try to find comfort in friends and family. When you feel the urge to "hook up" randomly, turn to your trusted friends, family member. Go out to eat or see a movie or just hang out. Or go to a church service or some other uplifting event. The point is you need to start finding alternative ways to satisfy your need for comfort. You're not crazy, but you need help. Your dad dying triggered a lot of emotions in you that were probably long buried. And now your mind and heart are struggling to cope with that. You're acting out, but you don't have to. But you do need to reach out for help. this is a start, but now you need to find others around you that you trust to help you further. Good luck.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you. Your advice made me cry because it hit home. Thanks again!
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