Hey!!
I'm Lollipop. I'm 15, but I know more than you would think. I've had my share of crap, and now I'm here to answer questions. I orginally joined this site to GET advice, but I've found that I answer more questions than I ask. I have also found that I relate to almost every love life question. Let's just say I had a tough year... So, that's my area of expertise. The one thing that bugs me the most on this site are when people say you're too young to feel what you feel. Screw that. I don't think it matters if you're 15 or 51, you know what you feel. I don't know much about sex because I believe in waiting until marriage, but I know what it's like to be pressured. Ask me something, and I will give you an answer.
xoxo
LoLLiPoP
Gender: Female
Location: USA
Age: 15
Member Since: July 13, 2009
Answers: 54
Last Update: July 1, 2015
Visitors: 7729
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Random Weirdos
View All
|
| |
I am 17/Female. I have been dating my current boyfriend for 11 months, and he is a wonderful guy. He treats me very well and obviously since we have been together for so long we are very comfortable being ourselves around each other. I feel that these are two very important qualities in a relationship, and that is why I have stayed with him for so long.
The problem is that I still have very strong feelings for my ex boyfriend. This ex boyfriend and I haven't spoken in a long time, but he was my first kiss and my first boyfriend. I have had long-lasting, deep, emotional/romantic feelings for my ex that I simply don't have for my current boyfriend. This of course makes me feel incredibly guilty, because my boyfriend doesn't do anything wrong and doesn't deserve that. And of course I can't exactly admit that I have feelings for someone else to my current boyfriend; I really don't want to hurt him. I have no idea what the solution is to this problem. No matter what I do, I can't seem to get over my ex. I have tried to move on by dating other guys, and obviously it's not working.
My question is, what should I do about the whole situation with my current boyfriend? I feel awful breaking up with him because I really do value our relationship deep down. I care about him a lot, and I constantly worry about what things will be like if I were to break up with him. I'm terrified to do so.
Also, what should I do about my ex boyfriend? I feel as though it is impossible for me to WILLINGLY give him up because for the majority of the past four years, he has been my entire life. I know that I need to get over him and I know that I need to talk to him to get the closure I need, but the problem is that I don't want to. (link)
|
Dear "ex boyfriend vs. current boyfriend",
Okay. Here's what I've figured out from talking to countless girls all over the world. You never get over the first guy. The first boyfriend, the first kiss, the first "I love you"... you won't ever be over him because, well, he's the first, and you've given so much of yourself to him. But you also gotta realize that he's in the past for a reason. Something happened and now it's over. He's probably over you... I'm guessing and you just need to understand that while you will always have feelings for this boy, you gotta move on.
My first boyfriend was the biggest dick you could think of. He only wanted me for physical stuff and dumped me in a text message when he got what he wanted. Yet, before that, I was some how in love with him. He hurt me so bad but even today I still have feelings for him. It's stupid! But it's just something girls have to deal with. And it sucks. (haha so do periods and child birth but we gotta do that too don't we?)
See, what I realized was that as much as I wanted to be friends with my ex, it just wouldn't work. It just made things sooo much harder. Maybe your still friends with your ex and that could be part of the problem. Now, I'm not saying you can't be friendly, I just wouldn't adise texting him or hanging out with him too much.Your current boyfriend sounds amazing. Put your energy into him because he's worked really hard to deserve that from you.
Of course, there is another possibility. If you still find yourself wanting your ex then maybe its just a way of your heart telling yourself your current boyfriend isn't right. I'm not saying that makes your ex right but maybe it's just that your looking for something more in your relationship that you can find with someone else. Not specifically your ex. If that makes sense...
Well that's all I've got to say on that... Hopefully something above helps you out.
Goodluck!
xoxo
LoLLiPoP
|
|
Rating: 5
| |
THANK YOU SO MUCH. your situation was exactly like mine. i appreciate your answer. i knew there must be other girls who went through it too - i hope we get over them someday. xoxo
|
|