I am totally honest i tell it like it is and if you dont like it im sorry but im not going to sugar coat answers to make you feel better i want to tell people the truth and tell them what i think is right so if you find that what i say is mean or not helpful just give me a low rating and move on but please dont be rude after all i did answer you question even if its not what you wanna hear just take the time to appreciate. Feel free to message me thank you :) (L)
Website: Pavans website
E-mail: pavandyal@live.ca
Gender: Female
Location: Canada Surrey B.C
Occupation: care aid
Age: 21
Member Since: May 28, 2006
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I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year in total, although we took a long break during the summer and fall of last year. We have been going strong again since the new year 2010. The way we got back together was all him. He told me he couldnt live without me and he changed since we last were together. And he has changed. Because of past relationships he was very closed and at the sign of the very first fight he would call it quits. I'm the longest relationship hes had. I love him, and he loves me, or so he says. For the first two months it was bliss. He was the sweetest most amazing boyfriend in the world. He built up all these expectations in my head. But after that? Nothing.
It's like either he doesnt love me anymore or he forgot how to show it. I dont understand why, but now hes getting to a point of not even being considerate of me. Like last night, one of his friends came from out of town and he told me hed go to dinner with him and his friends. I said okay no prob, and he said hed call to let me know what was up later. I went to sleep eventually and he calls at 4 in the morning saying hed been bar hopping and drinking and if he could crash at my place since his house is much farther. Naturally I didnt want him drinking and driving so i said okay. but i was very uneasy about the whole thing especially since he wanted us to always tell each other what we are doing at all times so we dont worry. He gets mad at me for only telling him hours in advance that I was going out with friends instead of days in advance. Then he does things like that. I told him i didnt like it and he apologized which is fine but I mean its just things like that and the fact that he used to talk to me everyday and send sweet messages and bring flowers and tell me really sweet things, and now its like im on a low maintenance plan, only doing things he thinks he has to for me not to be upset.
I asked him what was wrong and he said he was cautious because he's never been in a relationship like this before and he feels like itl end any minute. I have endured a lot with him and helped him get over his issues and I'm still here, and I assured him I'm not going anywhere, but it doesnt seem to make a difference. He's still inconsiderate and selfish. How can I help him be sweeter without flat out telling him? I tried that and it hasnt worked... I'm not happy like this anymore and I feel like i deserve more effort from him :/ it really makes me feel like he doesnt care about me anymore, although he swears he does...
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K well first of all talking is the only way to get through to him so you need to sit him down and talk to him about everything your feeling and what he needs to do to make things better and if he doesnt listen or still seems like he doesnt care then maybe he just isnt the right guy because if he truly loves you he will try to work on himself and try to make things better and if he doesnt seem to be doing that then you need to let him know that either he starts to put in an effort or you have to break up. A lot of guys feel like if they put in all there effort at the starting of the relationship they dont have to work as hard afterwards and thats obviously not true which is why a lot of relationship dont last. Hope i helped :D
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