lovealways1221's advice column

I'm just an average person. I love to help people out :) it makes me feel better about myself. I've been in a lot of situations so I can most likely relate to a lot of your problems. I know what it feels like to not have anyone to talk to about your problems, which is why i'm an advicenator. I'm ready to help people and be there for everyone who needs advice or just a companion to speak out to. I'm always here if you need me, don't hesitate to drop a question or even just a vent/rant note about a problem to my advice column inbox. I respond to all of them regardless of the topic. I'm upfront and abrupt about my answers and never sugarcoat. Take my advice or not, but i'm just doing my job :)

Played volleyball for over 10 years, also a coach. I love to try new things. Currently I'm trying the new sport of tennis and learning about my passion of photography.

advice

I am fourteen (girl) and my boyfriend is sixteen (boy) and we have been dating for five (almost six) months. I really really really like him, and that's why I'm asking this question or I would have broken up with him a while ago. We met at the begining of the school year, talked for three months, then started dating. The problem is, for the past month he's been... the best word for it really is PMSy. Like moody and wierd. One day he'll be perfectly fine and then the next (or even the next hour) he'll act like he wants nothing to do with me. We've talked about this problem SO MANY TIMES. He recognized this is his fault and he says there is nothing I can do to help. But if its not my fault then its not fair that I have to suffer. He can be mean... Like he'll just say something bratty or respond with one word answers like okay? and cool... like he doesn't even give a shit. It pisses me off. THe thing is though, this happened so suddenly. That's why I haven't broken up with him. I honestly don't think he has changed as a person. People can't change so dramatically so quickly. He's a good guy and he's good for me. I don't know what love is really but I think I might love him. I just don't know what to do anymore... We agreed to try and work this out but he doesn't always seem to want to do that. He'll act like its this big burden. Or he'll barely try. All in all, he acknowledges that he's being a dick, but he doesn't know why he's doing it. THe past two days have actually been good though... I know I want to work this out, and I know he does too but my question is; WHAT CAN WE DO TO FIX IT?? Like, is there something specific we can do? and I mean DO. We're done with the talking. We've talked about everything over and over and over again. I just want it to WORK now. I know we can do it. I jut don't know how. We've tried to find reasons, and I honestly think it is because we rushed into physical stuff kind of quickly. He was a lot more experienced than me and I felt kind of hurried along... I wanted to do the stuff we did I just didn't know it would affect me like this. I think it made me clingy... But I don't know. It could also be that he's having some friend issues and school stuff but still... Just.. HELP.

I agree with what the other person has said. You said you were hurried along and you feel clingy. You say he's a nice guy.. so think about it. doesn't it make sense that he wants to break up (hence the getting distant part) but is too nice to do it. He's just trying to get you frustrated and make you break it off. instead of him doing it.

don't get me wrong.. you can TRY to fix it. you can take other people advice and try to work things out. but all that's going to do is prolong the breakup and just make everything hectic and crazy and dramatic. I think you like him too much. You're too emotionally attached to him. To the part where you will do anything to make it work. But honestly, if he's not doing anything to make it work, he's not committed to you. he's not committed to doing anything to make it work. he's basically making you do everything and making you fix it. you have to let him know that its not a 1 man job. either you BOTH do something to fix it (not talking) or if he's making you do it alone, then its over.

relationships are about committment. you guys are committing yourselves to each other. and if he's not willing to push himself to the brink of destruction to make it work, then he's not even worth it. don't you want a guy who will be head over heels for you and adore you? you don't want a guy who will just sit there and watch you try to fix everything.. that's called being a lazy ass.

do yourselves both a favor and break it off now before things get very emotional and ugly.

good luck

wow ok… my advice had NOTHING to do with physical stuff.. so why are you rating me a 2 and saying "it's not like we slept together"..

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(Rating: 2) better than the advice before you. jeez guys its not like i slept with him. i don't know why that porty person said i "gave it all away too soon" i let him put his hand somewhere okay? jeez. weve been dating for half a year, our relationship means a little more than that physical stuff

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