I'm not here to tell you what to think or do, but to give you as much honest, accurate information as possible. If I don't know an answer to a specific question, I'll research it before replying. I won't sugarcoat things; my job is to tell it like it is.
I've got a particular interest in sexual health and sexuality. I know a lot about fertility and pregnancy - and firsthand now, as I've just had twins. I'm also an accredited sexual health worker.
Gender: Female Occupation: Counsellor, writer, mother of twins. Age: 31 Member Since: August 9, 2004 Answers: 1493 Last Update: November 5, 2009 Visitors: 172937
Main Categories: General Sex Questions Random Weirdos Mental health View All
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Hi Alison,
Since your advice was the most gentle and...well "forgiving", so to speak, I want to go a tad further and ask you some specifics.Not being eager to air my linen in the most public of forums I chose to contact the person that I considered to give the best advise and then ask on a more personal level. To be honest my queston goes a little beyond the "MIld" public forum version. My ex-wife was bi-sexual and we enjoyed many MMF sessions, which we both enjoyed, Her probably more so than me whereas she eventually left me and moved to Cali with one of her female lovers....OOPS! Anyway, when she employed toys and prothetics to engage in butt play with me, I'm ashamned to sy it was incredible!!! She insisted this made me Bi as well and for the sake of fairness, I consented to a MMF. The sex was o.k. but not nearly as arousing as it was with the toys and strap-ons. I suppose it was guilt or hangups on my part, so she said, but I just wasn't as into it with another guy. Am I bi? or uptight? or just a regular guy that lies an occasional butt drubbing? Is this common? (link)
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First things first: I don't think you should be 'ashamed' you like what you like. Especially as what you like doesn't hurt you or anyone else.
Now that we've got that out of the way, none of this makes you bisexual. I'm not saying you AREN'T bisexual, because only you know that - but there is nothing odd about a straight guy liking to play with sex toys. The prostrate gland is reached by a finger (or toy!) up your bum, and this is provides a physiological reaction that feels pleasureable. It's normal and natural.
If you aren't that into sex with other guys, don't have sex with other guys. If you change your mind about this at some point, then that's okay too.
Many, many straight guys like sex with toys, anal play, etc. It's common. I often think that people think they are weird simply because they don't realise other people have the same thoughts, feelings, or fantasies.
Your ex certainly seemed in a hurry to label you as things: bi, guilty, hung up. And it seems to me she did this in order to serve her own desires. She's out of the picture now, so it's a great opportunity for you to rediscover yourself and understand that the only person who really knows you is you.
I wish you the best.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you very much...you must do this a lot. you're very good at it!
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