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April 27, 2008Answers:
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I can not stand smoking. i mean i really cant, my entire family was shocked when they found out that my boyfriend of over a year smoked. We have talked about him quitting, ways to quit, trying to cut down, cold turkey, patches, ect. I cant be around him for like 20 minutes every time after he smokes he has to pretty much brush his teeth and use breath strips all the time and change his clothes just to be around me. I find it weird that he is willing to do all of these things but WILL OT STOP SMOKNG. He says he has been cutting down for the last .. nearly two years.. but he really has not. He says he really does want to quit, bad habbit, bad for his heart, ME..ect. I have been to just about every "quit smoking" web site with him reading, trying to understand, trying to help him put a mental block up. He thinks he is going to have terrible withdrawls so bad hes going to have a heart attack. (he has a heart defect but nothing really says that the withdrawls will do anything like THAT to him). So i dont know how or what more to say. Please any help, anything at this point.. thanks in advance
I understand what your saying about wanting him to quit because smoking is not good for the health and it bothers you. But I think by you pressuring him like this and involving your family the way you say you have isnt right. Quitting smoking is something you can only do when you want to. The time has to be right. If he doesnt %110 want to, he wont succeed. And it sounds to me like the main reason that you want him to quit is because YOU dont like smoking. Not because of the health issues or anything like that. And thats kind of selfish. Im only being honest here. It you want him to quit, let him know, which you obviously have, but dont pressure him so much. That will only stress him out and possibly make him want to smoke more. Your supposed to love him for him and accept him. Giving your opinion is fine, but forcing it is not. What if you were with someone who was a vegetarian and hated meat and you loved it. How would you feel if they tried to get you to stop eating meat the way you and your family try to get him to stop smoking. Think about it. Again, im not trying to be mean. Im just trying to show you things from his possible perspective. Its good to try to put yourself in the other persons shoes. Good luck.
(Rating: 1) I was asking for ways to help him. sorry you were way too critical and did not actually provide any information (thats why such a poor score). By the way he eats meat and encourages me to be the vegeterian i am. and i encourage him to eat meat because he has a metabalism disorder. Thanks for trying though. better luck next time.