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Photobucket" align=left hspace=10> Allooooo~ well to start off...I go by as Dennise and giving advice is what I'm here to do and I plan to provide whatever assistance I can offer to the best of my abilities.

I've had my share of ups-and-downs (don't we all) and I'm more than willing enough to help those that ask.

In fair warning: I won't give answers that are "gusshied with sprinkles on top" (or whatever things that that line follows). I will be blunt if the situation calls for it...either you take the honest words or brush it off and go search for a lie~ all in all, it's entirely your choice.
Advice is simply there for people to brood and consider over, not a forceful act.

So feel free to ask me whatever you wish to be answered and the advice shall slide over these keyboards~ ^-^


"If it's free, it's advice; if you pay for it, it's counseling;
if you can use either one, it's a miracle."
-Jack Adams-

"If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it,
If you don't ask, the answer is always no.
If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place."
-Anonymous-







advice

I am 24 years old and am currently at a point in my life where I don't think I can be friends with my life-long friend of 19 years.

I have stood by him, even though it was hard, despite all the terrible decisions he's made with his life. He has 2 DWI's, lost his car, lost his band because of his drinking, lost many friends, slept with a friends girlfriend whom he is currently still with. He faces jail time, and could quite possibly lose his job. Needless to say, he's almost lost everything.

The other night my girlfriend and I went out with them, trying to put things behind us. Well, he decided to just disappear and abandon his girlfriend there. She was understandably upset and we took her to his house, where her car was. In the end, he was extremely angry that we helped her, and accused me of telling her lies and badmouthing him. Also saying I'm trying to "get between them."

In a nutshell, 3 people have one account of the evening, and he has his. It's completely wrong. He's desperate, possessive, and not fun to be around anymore. He doesn't want help, and gets defensive claiming people should mind their own business, etc, despite being his best friend.

It only got worse... He actually blindsided me for helping her, punching me in the nose from behind me. It became a physical confrontation and was obviously a act of complete desperation since he claimed we were making the situation worse and were trying to "make him look bad."

I've tried helping but he isn't receptive. I'm not perfect either, and make plenty of mistakes, but every time we hang out it feels like a gamble. I'm tired of it. Is it selfish of me to move on with my life?

Change is sometimes for the better or even for the worse. It happens to all of us and there's nothing selfish about moving on with your own life especially if you believe that you can't handle the rough situation your friend got himself involved in. And if he wants to deal with his own problems without any helping hand then let him be and just focus on your life. Since he's behaving in such a manner that's apparently harming you and your other friends, it's time to let him go because his stubbornness could lead to something more dangerous for you.

Don't worry about your decision. It's yours to decide though. There are limits to what each person can handle and there's no one to blame for if we decide to move on. Don't feel guilty or selfish of what your decisions are, think what would be best for you...and maybe even your friend.

Hope this helped a little! =3

[view]

(Rating: 5) "And if he wants to deal with his own problems without any helping hand then let him be and just focus on your life."

Thank you for your input. I feel that sentence alone justifies the rating...and helps a lot. Thank you.
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