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chick named ERINMember Since:
February 17, 2008Answers:
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about
Hey whattsupp, my names Erin, but i sign E whenever I answer a question. I'm a sophmore in high school. I used to run, but strained my back and now i'm done. I love track so if you need any help in that I'm your girl! I'm love giving advice and helping people with their problems. I've been through so much in 15 years, that I can pretty much help anyone. Feel free to ask me anything I'd rather tell you that i don't know than give you a bad or wrong answer.I love clothes so i'm best at answering questions about style or fashion. When I grow up I want to be either an actress or a fashion desighner. So these are my best subjects! Butt, I can help in pretty much all of them :). Please feel free to ask me anything, I'll ALWAYS answer to the best of my ability, and come on here as often as possible!
-E!
advice
Hi. I'm 17 and my boyfriend is 21. We have been together for a year and 4 months now. When we first got together, I remember him telling me about how his neighbor would beat his wife all the time, and he said this with admiration in his voice. I asked him if he thought it was okay to hit a woman, and he said yeah.
He does have anger problems, and the least little thing would set him off.
He used to tell me not to come to his house unless his cousin was with me, and one time I did go without his cousin and he huffed and puffed and balled up his fists, and turned sharply and walked away...later on he told me that he was going to knock me across the yard...he would always tell me how badly he wished he could put his hands on me and put me in my place. One time I was standing outside his car, and he hurt me by pulling my arm halfway through the window and pushing down on it from inside. But he never hit me.
But now he's taking medicine to control his temper and things are much better, and it's like he's a different person. But not long ago, I went to a friend's house, Don, to do his hair, and my boyfriend followed me there and hit the gas and kept speeding past the house, back and forth like a maniac. Then he called everyone he knows and got them to call me to tell me how much he was sorry, etc.
Another thing is that one night he took my cell phone from me and went through it and started calling numbers he didnt know, accusing me of cheating. When I tried to get the phone back, he almost hit me. Then he cornered me, grabbed my face tight, and told me that I had better not be cheating on him.
I'm afraid of him, so when he does things like that, I just lower my head. Then, when we're on the phone the next day, he laughs about how scared of him I was. Now he's told me that he doesnt want me to talk to Don at all anymore, even though I've told him constantly that we're just friends. And to top it off, he's trying to get me pregnant. I've told him I don't want kids right now, but he keeps 'forgetting' condoms or takes them off when I'm not looking. He has actually told me that he wants me to have his baby so that I can't leave him.
He's really a sweet person, and compared to what I went through when we first started dating, our relationship is peaceful now. But now that we're supposed to be living together soon, I'm worried that he might change and go back to his old ways. Call me crazy, but we have a great relationship when he's not angry, and I don't want to leave...I've tried leaving him in the past, but he cries and begs for me to come back. Since he's been taking his medicine the only time he gets really mad is when he thinks I'm cheating or something.
How high is the chance that he's going to become physically abusive in the future? Would this already be considering abuse or controlling behavior? Any thoughts/advice is appreciated. Thanks!
This guy is a reck. HE has alredyy harmmed you. I think that its time to kick this guy to the curb. He is going to take over your whole life. I think that since he was already that way theres like a 99% chance that he can go back to his old ways. He could stop his medicine and hurt you. You could really get hurt and possibly end up dead. IF a guy can't give you the respect you diserve, end it.Your still going through this so you can't say it is over. End it.
-E
(Rating: 4) thanks