askJasmine_Moon
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Q: ok so i was curious what fingering is like so i tried it and i felt NOTHING. no pleasure no pain-nothing. granted if my bf did it his fingers are longer and bigger than mine because i have really small hands but still... i have looked up fingering but i dont even think i have a 'spot' or w/e because i really dont feel anything. is there a special way guys do it or something different about when a guy does it opposed to a girl on herself? thanks so much :)
WARNING VERY GRAPHIC!!

If I had to guess, you likely didn't relax yourself enough before you tried it.

I don't know exactly what you did, but I suspect that you were rushing yourself.

Just as if you were to have sexual relations with a guy, you need to help yourself become aroused before it will be enjoyable. Also, many females become blocked because they are convinced that this is "naughty" or "something unnatural"..when in fact, it is COMPLETELY natural, and a good way to practice safe sex!!

{warning graphic explanation coming}
Begin by closing your eyes, and then by lightly stroking on the outside of your underwear, it's best if you keep your eyes closed (in my experience), and relax as much as possible.(I prefer to cover up that way I don't feel like I'm some sort of porn star on display-even though no one is there to look: but that is up to you) Don't let yourself get caught up in thinking that you won't enjoy it, or it is "unnatural" in any way!

As you relax more and more..move your finger closer to your nude skin..at this point you may want to remove your panties, or maybe you won't- whatever is more comfortable to YOU.

Tease yourself..don't rush it.

Rub your fingers along the outside edges and let yourself enjoy what you are doing. Stroking your vagina from back to front, with your entire hand on the outside, also helps you to relax and enjoy more.

As you feel your body begin to react, start to rub lightly on your clitoris- (this is the very top of your vaginal area and the type of orgasm that most women experience- you may want to go in slow circles).

You may just enjoy doing this..if you feel like you want to go further..slowly move your fingers down to your vagina and, again rub on the outside but lower down. (again circles sometimes feel good). This is the point, if you haven't already enjoyed yourself, that you would SLOWLY insert your finger, a very little bit at a time, you may even want to move your hips in rhythm just as if you were having actual intercourse.

If you find that you enjoy one movement more than the other, free yourself to move back and forth- remember this is YOUR BODY, and you can do to it as you please, you can enjoy it as you please!

Eventually you should be desire to insert your finger further (doesn't mean you have to put it all the way in, just do what you enjoy doing)...curve your finger upwards (palm up) and you can "tickle" yourself a little, by making a small "come here" movement with your finger.

If you find that you enjoy self-gratification, the "come here" movement will eventually find your g-spot. You'll know when you find it-it's actually "raised" a little. (and the least likely, but most gratifying, kind of orgasm a woman has).

now go practice safe sex! *smile*,
Jasmine

Post Edit:

Most all women achieve orgasm by way of stimulating their clitoris rather than with their g-spot (which is why most guys are always trying to find it -teehee- the elusive g-spot!). Honestly, I didn't find my own g-spot till my early thirties! So, most women find that to stimulate their clitoris (like I said, in circles or slowly stroking) while also fingering themselves brings them the most pleasure!


hahaha thanks!! i think i found my spot and i tried the come here thing and it was kinda nice but still didnt do anything-is it possible i just cant finger myself enough for pleasure? that maybe a guy fingering me or sex is the only way to orgasm that way? cause i orgasm cause of my clit but not my g-spot. thanks

bio
Jasmine_Moon
I'm a 36 year old mom who has too much life experience. I realize that, no matter your age, life throws some crazy curve balls at you when you least expect it. I know in my heart that absolutely no one is perfect..and we all make wrong decisions at one time or another; and sometimes we just need someone to help us out without being judgmental! Furthermore, I think that the only stupid question is the one that you don't ask...knowledge is power.

One of my favorite sayings:
"If you live in a glass house, don't throw stones."

Well folks, we ALL live in glass houses at one time or another!

Never say never,
Jasmine

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April 11, 2008

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