My name is Jesa, ask a question, get an answer.
Gender: Female
Location: Washington
Occupation: Student
Age: 24
Member Since: January 17, 2006
Answers: 158
Last Update: October 23, 2009
Visitors: 10676
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karenR
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i have done random play w/ two different guys at the same time and i feel very messed up and dont know where it comes from is it normal? i'm 18 years old so its not like im a 14 year old anymore or something, but still i dont care i just let myself do random play and dont care, later on i think about it and dont understand where it comes from and its kept a secret from people...ive never cared for some reason of giving myself up to people and taken my virginity as a blessed thing, is that bad? can it have to do w/ being sexually abused when i was little when i cant even remember what may have happend? opinions please... (link)
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Unfortunately you may not like my suggestion, but I'm going to give it to you anyway. I'm a student of Psychology and I deal with several people that are now adults but were once abused as children. It is completely normal that your mind has "blocked" what happened as a child, however I disagree with the person who said "what you are doing to yourself is "normal", because it is NOT normal to have sexual interaction with multiple partners simultaneously and not care at all. Often times people who were abused as children fall into two major groups, those that avoid sex, and those that become promiscuous without care. The reason that you can so easily have sexual interaction without caring is because you are not emotionally present during these incidents.That is a natural defense mechanism that you probably developed as a child. The fact is, you are NOT A SLUT, but what is happening to you is a direct result of the aftermath of abuse. I strongly urge you to seek therapy. If that is not possible consider self education, hit the libraries and learn all that you can about abuse survivors and therapy treatments. Some of the treatments you learn about you may be able to do on your own or with the help of a trusted friend. I apologize if you are offended at the suggestion of getting therapy but frankly I'm more worried about your well being than how you rate my advice. You need help, hands down, no questions asked. Please feel free to contact me at my personal email address nighthunter020@yahoo.com if you would like to discuss this further.
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Rating: 5
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hey jesa, i really appreciate your advice and have actually took that advantage to get a therapist. i was hearing that too much about how its not wrong but i felt it was wrong and im glad to know from someone who actually has talked w/ people w/ these expierences/read about them. thank you and i would like to continue to talk w/ you =]
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