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I am a 27 year old female from Scotland. I have a lot of life experience and will do my best to answer any questions you have honestly.

advice

I recently saw a question here....it kind of resembles mine. about online relationships. I'm a 15 year old girl and my best friend (who is also a girl) is 18. I don't know WHAT THE HELL is going on in her mind. She's always depressed, and upset. Over and over. So what does she do? She gets herself an online boyfriend. They start talking. Sending e-mails on and off. And listening to each other talk through MSN voice clips. (This has been going on for a year). Whenever I question her about the reason for this..she always tells me "how can you say that? I love him!" In my mind, I'm thinking (how do you love him? you don't even KNOW him!) That doesn't worry me so much though. Because we live in a different country than him. What DOES worry me...is that she has seen only 2 pictures of him! And the pictures that she has seen, were blurry, and of really bad quality. I'm trying to knock some frikkin' sense into her. She's sending him all of these pictures of herself because he, very nicely, asks for them (I've talked to him before, he's a total FAKE nutcase). I can't stop her. She has plans to move in with him. how can you move in with a stranger ...of whom you only saw...2 horrible-quality pictures of? Maybe that's not even him! And she still has so much trust for him. I tried to sit down and talk to her. She won't listen. What should I do? I don't want her to ruin her life! Could this be a wanting of attention? Is she desperate? :(

It seems to me that she is perhaps depressed and maybe this guy is giving her attention that she feels that she cannot get face to face. Maybe she has been hurt in the past.

I would suggest that you compliment her and encourage her to try new things and meet new people.

It is unfair to say that people cannot fall in love in this way however, it appears that this guy is indeed a fake and that you are right to be concerned.

From what you have said I would presume that her parents are unaware of the situation - I know that "telling" on a friend is not something any of us ever want to do however, if this guy is a fake then you could be saving her a lot of agony and hurt in the future so perhaps you should consider it.

There is absolutely no reason that this guy should only have sent her two very poor quality photos and received a lot more in return. You are right to be a worried by this. There are people out there who collect photos of young girls for very bad reasons and I am concerned that you friend is getting herself into hot water, particularly if she is sharing details such as where she lives with this guy. He may say that he is in another country however, how does she actually know that he is telling the truth.

Maybe she should call his bluff??? Tell him that she has spoken with her parents about him and that they would like to meet him and that way she will be able to tell from his reaction whether he is actually genuine or not.

I hope this helps.

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(Rating: 5) It does help. Thank you very much
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