Hey there. Ask away whatever you want answered and I'll do my best. Please avoid unconventional capitalization and spelling - it makes the questions harder to read and so I'm less likely to answer.
Website: My Deviantart Site
Gender: Female
Location: Wandering
Member Since: September 23, 2004
Answers: 144
Last Update: May 31, 2009
Visitors: 12844
Main Categories:
Friendship
Theater
School
View All
Favorite Columnists
sparklythingy
maria
|
| |
First off, I'm a 15-year-old girl
I'm tired of falling on love with guys who are too old for me (the oldest being 21 and a friend of mine).
How do I avoid this happening?
Thank you. (link)
|
Here's my guess: you probably act older than your real age. You probably do it without realizing it, but that makes people older think you're older and therefore they treat you as their peers in terms of age. Unfortunately, this can lead to you (or anyone in your position) feeling as though there may be an attraction between you and whomever you're speaking to - even when there isn't one (or at least not a mutual one).
I totally get the liking older guys thing because I'm usually the same way. Sadly, older guys usually have the same maturity level as younger girls and the guys who are 14-16 act like a bunch of 3rd graders (and that's on a good day!)
I think that the best thing you can do is to get involved in activities in and out of your school with people closer to your age so you can broaden your activies repertoire and get to know more people your own age. Sure, they'll be less mature, but...maybe you can make them step up to your level of maturity instead of you having to step down to be on the level that they are.
Maybe a re-evalutation of WHY you like these guys is in order. Is it looks? maturity? are they usually more kind? Are those kinds of things possible to find in people your age?
Maybe you have standards that are too high and need to be lowered. I know, it doesn't sound like a good plan, but it might work. If you don't want to lower the standards, then perhaps a love-life is the wrong thing to focus on right now. No one needs a guy or girl to be a significant other in 8th, 9th or even 10th grade (well, you never really NEED anyone) so maybe this is the wrong time in your life to be worrying about that.
Just shrug off crushes, especially if you know they can't work out. "yeah, I like him. problem? it's not like I'm going to be dating him" Crushes are normal. I don't think there's a way to stop you from liking older guys, but there is a way to avoid falling into a typical teenage girl trap (which you may or may not be in). Keep your mind and options open, don't get set on one guy.
Good luck!
|
|
Rating: 5
| |
Thank you, BlackAngel, for your kind words of wisdom. -_^
|
|