askBasketball3846
advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: hi ..
MYSTERY GUY

negatives: he lives outside the country but we keep in touch (once or twice a week calls), i love him SOOO much and its heart-breaking not being with him. we agree to have this open relationship because we love each other but we live in different countries.

possitives.. he is coming to visit me in spring break and i'm spending the whole summer in his house..i'm INLOVE with him ..

GOOD GUY
Negatives: he is outside the country taking college exams. i LOVE him but i'm not INlove.

Positives: he is coming IN spring break TOO and staying a year in my country. he is stable and wants this serious relationship. he says that IF I WANT he could move and study in my country instead of the one he just applied to which is outside the country.

ok ... don't tell me the "if you were INLOVE you wouldn't doubt.. I"M SURE I LOVE the "mystery guy" BUT long distance relationships are extremely hard and has 0 garanties.

the "good guy" loves me deeply and wants me to stay the summer with him..

i asked my mom and she said that the GOOD guy is the way to go b/c the "follow your heart" only happens in movies.. i have done nothing but cry after she told me.. i mean is it true!? should i follow my brain instead of my heart?! i have to decide b/c IF i tell the mystery guy to come in sprping break it will be over with the good guy. and i have to decide what am i going to do over summer.. go to the mystery's guy house or stay with the good guy?

tell me what should i do?
what would YOU do?
this will change my life..
Well I know this isn't going to help much but, follow your heart. It sounds like you've tried it and you said you're IN LOVE with this mystery guy which I personally think is much stronger than the love you have for the good guy. Like you said, there are no gaurentees in long distance relationships and I know personally they are very very hard to keep working. Though, you could always ask mystery guy if he would every consider moving to your country and studying there to make things easier on the both of you or maybe you could move there (depending on your age of course).

on the other hand, while spending the summer with the good guy, you could find that you truly fall IN love with him and realize that you made a good choice. Obviously this guy really likes you since he is moving away from where he is from to be with you.

if i was you, I would stay with the Good Guy. This is because I believe that you will fall in love with this guys love for you and also in love with him. there is also the knowledge that he is serious and it's not long distance where you have to constanly worry and miss the person. Overall, either way you go I'm sure you will be happy and overtime you're going to wish you made the other choice to see what it was like and how it could have turned out. This happens to everyone but remember, follow your heart and do what you think is right. I'm sure you'll be happy with whoever you pick.

hey .. thanks a lot .. i know "follow your heart" seems the easy way but the concequences are what worries me .. i really like your advice cus you gave me "the right thing to do" and "what would you do" .. it helps a lot .. THANKS AGAIN ..

bio
Basketball3846
Hey guys! My name is Leah and I am 15 years old. I'm from Maine where it's always beautiful but for some reason, everyone here wants to leave it. I love playing basketball and just hangin out with my friends whenever I can. I am the advice giver in my group of friends and I always help them out with whatever it is they may need. When I get older I want to be a phyciatrist and have a huskey named Isabella. I don't know why but I do. If you have a problem, I am here for you and wont judge you at all. I never pass up on a question passed to me so don't be shy. I've been through a lot in the past 15 years and I'm sure I will be able to answer a majority of you guys' questions. Hit me up and don't forget to live for the moment. It's the most important thing you can do.

Info
Website:
E-mail:
Gender:
Female

Location:
Maine

Occupation:
Camp Councelor

Age:
15

AIM:
Member Since:
July 7, 2004

Answers:
216

Last Update:
July 7, 2006

Visitors:
14002

Main Categories:





Favorite Columnists





layout by Adam Particka

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker