Member Since: September 11, 2005
Answers: 243
Last Update: January 2, 2006
Visitors: 14545
|
| |
Hello. . .19/f here with a problem...
I met this guy about 2 months ago. We've already had sex, and we act like a couple to an extent. . spending a lot of time with each other, kissing/cuddling/ect, talking on the phone for hours... He has told me that he cares for me and loves me.
He's afraid to be in a relationship, though, because his last (very serious) girlfriend cheated on him with his brother and is now pregnant with his brother's baby. He doesn't trust anyone. He has admitted to me, though, that he holds back some of his feelings for me.
Some days, he's very sweet to me and wants to be around and is very affectionate. Other days, he's kind of cold and shuts me out a little bit. Either way, he wants to hang out; it's just the way he acts around me that varies.
He has bi-polar disorder. I'm begining to think that maybe this disorder, although medicated, is making him act this way.
So these are my questions.
1. Does anyone have manic depression/bi-polar disorder? If you do, can you tell me how this disorder effects your social skills?
2. I want to be in a relationship with him, but I don't know how to help him take that extra step to trust me. He says "I love you, but i'm not in love with you. I don't think I could be in love with anyone." How can I help him stop holding back?
I'll rate you highly if you at least try to help.
Thanks. (link)
|
I went through the same thing. We both had heartache in our lives. To some extent he could be saying all that as an exuse to not make a commitment. (i know some1 who is bi-polar, and that hasnt stopped her from being in a relationship) I really liked this guy, and he told me he didnt want a gf right now, but i hear that he does stuff with other girls. Well i dont know about you, but i dont want to be used like that. Do me a favor> Stop the sex for awhile, and see if he still hangs around, but DONT let him know why. If he asks or brings it up, act like you didnt hear. You can kiss and show affection, but thats it. Its a test to see if he really wants you, or if its just the sex hes interested in! If he really wanted to, he could let go of whatevers holding him back. I mean hes not holding back on the sex, just the commitment that goes along with it! Think about it! There is a big difference between "LOVE" and being "IN LOVE"!! Dont give yourself to a guy who doesnt want to be committed to you. Sounds like he just wants to be friends with benefits!!
Good Luck!!
|
|