I'm a 19 year old girl who lives in Arizona...nothing really more to say about that. I am engaged and will be married in October of 2006. Uh...I'm pretty much a nerd at heart. I like to play video games, tabletop RPG's, and cosplay. People always say I don't look like I'd be a nerd, so I guess that's a good thing? I think I give decent advice, however I do like to joke around so sometimes I will post witty/sarcastic advice, especially if the question is stupid.
Website: My journal
Gender: Female
Location: Arizona
Occupation: College Student
Age: 19
AIM: Miss Night Rain
Yahoo: nerdgirlix
Member Since: September 21, 2005
Answers: 132
Last Update: January 17, 2006
Visitors: 13559
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I write out suicide notes and read them over and over...i write long paragraphs explaining to my family why I killed my self..while I write it I am laughing and thinking how fun this is, I get a thrill out of it. Sometimes I think I am depressed, but I don't feel depressed. I love thinking about suicide, wondering who would be at my funeral, if anyone would cry or care. I feel like I am going crazy, it's always on my mind, am I just crazy? Because I don't have any of the symptoms of depression.. (link)
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Maybe you're just obsessed with death, and curious if others care about you enough to be sad when you die. You may not want to die, but you seem to just be very curious about how the world would react to your death.
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Rating: 5
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Wow, I never looked at it from that way. Your absolutely right. That is one of the reasons I think about suicide alot because I am curious about how the world would react to my death and wonder if anyone would care if I am gone or not...but then again some people would say your depressed and sad because you feel no one is there for you...so I dont know what it really is..could my obsession be linked to an obsessive complusive disorder? Like I have obsessions with death and suicide then my compulsion would be to write out the letters to relief my obsession?
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