I am completely blunt. Unlike the ignorant adults who feel like they are keeping you safe by "sugar coding" the truth. I'm going to tell you how it is.
I have been on my own since i turned 18. I have the brady bunch family on the outside, and the Osbournes on the inside.
despite overcoming a drug addiction at the age of 16, I later found my place in this world, Helping others. If you want the TRUTH talk to me.
I'm not mean or rude, i just say what's real! check out my web page and see what type of person I am.
E-mail: Amanda_vann2005@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: Texas
Age: 18
AIM: strafish72204
Member Since: September 11, 2005
Answers: 47
Last Update: October 8, 2005
Visitors: 4325
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I'm 17/F and I need advice concerning my boyfriend. We have been together about 2 months now and things have been up and down between us, but we are head over heels in love with eachother. We occasionally have our fights over petty things, but we always make up and I am very happy being with him. Well recently things were even more amazing than usual and we hadn't fought like we usually would. Well it seems like everyone is out to break us up. I had my ex boyfriend trying to tell him that I cheated on him, and then I had guys that used to be friends with him telling me he cheated on me. Everyone was trying to get us to break apart and the underlying reason was crystal clear to me: They wanted us to break up so that I would be single so they could make their move on me. All of them mentioned how they could "treat me better" and all that bullshit. I truly love my boyfriend and I would NEVER cheat on him. But the one area that I always stumble into in all the relationships I've been in is trust. I'm naturally not a very trusting person. And I definently don't trust my boyfriend that much. I trust he would never cheat on me, but when he tells me something I don't trust his word on it. He makes up white lies all the time and exaggerates alot. I have no problem with this really, because I can be a fibber at times as well. But the problem I do have is that he is VERY secretive about his serious issues in his life. Like his family especially. He only lets me know bits and pieces about his family issues. He lives with his mom and his step-dad. I know ALOT about this family. I've met them and I know all of them really well. But his real dad I don't know much about and he doesn't tell me much. His real dad he is not allowed to see because his mom doesn't want him around him, so she told my boyfriend that if she caught him going up there to see him she would send him to military school. So he secretly keeps in contact with him and visits him only about twice a year. He said he won't tell me much about it because the last girl he was with threatened to tell on him to his mom once and she almost got him caught and he said he wants to keep certain things to himself. And I understand that. I'm the same way. But he is double-sided. If I keep something to myself and I am upset about it, he will get PISSED if I don't tell him all the details. And just last night I was hanging out with him and his mom called his cell demanding him to get his ass home or she would call the cops. He had just got off work and it was around 12:30 when we drove back to his house. His mom and step dad were pissed because he "hadn't done his laundry" and he was out late, when he doesn't have a curfew on the weekends! So that didn't at all make sense to me. Well he pulled up at his house and his step dad was standing in the front lawn. He gave me a kiss goodnight and the minute he opened the car door to get out, his step dad reached his hand into the car, grabbed my boyfriend by the hair and threw him onto the front lawn and started punching him and kicking in his ribs and face! I immediately got out of my car and ran over there. His step dad was punching him and cussing him out and my boyfriend was on the ground screaming, "I didn't do anything wrong! STOP!" Well I started screaming at his dad to stop fucking beating him up and he looked at me and briefly stopped and told me to get in my fucking car and get the hell out of there or something will happen. I stood there not wanting to leave, but my boyfriends uncle gently pushed me toward my car and told me to leave quickly. The whole night I couldn't sleep or eat and I was crying all night and morning because I was afraid they found out he went to see his real dad and they were going to send him away. And I was also afraid my boyfriend would decide to move 2 hours away to get away from them. Well I finally got to see my boyfriend around 10:30 and his face was all cut up, his ear cartilage was torn, his back was covered in welts and so was his neck and chest, and his head had a HUGE bump on it. He told me his step dad called the cops on him because he punched him and busted his nose. (His dad had continued beating the shit out of him for 15 minutes straight after I left and drug him by his hair up the stairs so my boyfriend got up and punched him in the face). Well when I asked why his dad did this he said he would tell me later. Then he told me later that he couldn't tell me because it was a "family issue" and it didn't concern me and it was something real serious, and he was told not to talk to anyone about it. Well I was upset that he wouldn't tell me, but I wasn't going to press it. Well later that night he told me the reason was because he "missed curfew", "kept having people over without permission", and "wasn't checking in with them enough". I know it was a lie. I can tell when he lies and he was lying to me. But I wasn't going to add stress by bringing it up. So is there any way that I can get my boyfriend to open up to me? I understand people need there privacy and some thing kept to themselves, but there are certain things I think I should be entitled to knowing since I am his girlfriend, and since he expects me to tell him about my serious issues as well. (Sorry my question is so long!) (link)
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The fact is..do you trust your boyfriend? Do you think he trusts you? There will be obsticles in a relationship but couples have to be strong and stick them out. That's what makes you strong! Forget thefriends who are trying to come in between you two. they aren't real friends to begin with. =)!
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Rating: 5
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Thanks for your advice. It was very helpful and encouraging. I do trust him and I do believe he trusts me, but I really would like him to include me in sharing certain aspects of his life.
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