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Okay, so friendship questions are rare for me. This is gonna be long. If you have a problem with that, stop reading right now.
I'm really kind of scared. My best friend, short of sister, I think, is addicted to this guy.
Problem is, they never dated. She liked him, but he didn't like her. Then she got over him, and he liked her.
Then she decided to unget over him.
He's a possessive asshole. He's basically "claimed" her and talks about their married future, and she goes with it, considering him hers as he considers her his.
The worst thing is, though, all her life, her family has considered her the "screwup", so all she's known is displacement and pain. She's longed for real love her whole life, even the "parent" kind of love. Not just the husband/wife love.
I don't even know how to explain this. She thinks he unconditionally loves her.
I have unconditional love. My boyfriend and I have discussed marriage, and he loves everything about me, even my flaws, and wouldn't change me.
This guy, however, he's used her, emotionally abused her, hurt her more than anything, and he's even like, haunting her dreams. He tried to change her. Get her to dye her hair blonde, change her clothing style, criticized everything...
I'm just afraid she's going to end up with him and cause herself more pain.
She's created an idea of him for herself. Things he does, she's given examples...I can see that he's only doing these things because he gets something out of it. He gets a person to possess. Someone to own. I hate him for what he's doing to her, but she won't let me talk sense into her.
I can't talk to him because he doesn't like me anyway.
I don't know what to do about this. This girl is seriously like my little sister. I want to protect her from him. Not from all guys, just from him because I know he's bad news.
He tried to convince me to cheat on my boyfriend with him, and to tell me that if he "really" wanted me, I could be his in a heartbeat, because he's just that good with women, which sickened me from the start. I don't understand what she sees in him. Fine. Whatever, I can deal with that.
I can't deal with him hurting her and making her think he's the last person out there for her (she's had bad luck in relationships).
On top of it all, she's afraid her parents are going to make her move, and they're not sending her to college next year, which is where she should be.
What do you think I should do? I mean, I can't really DO anything. What can I say?
-Siren =( (link)
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Well first off if you can't change the fact that he is part of your friends life then don't.But you can help your friend out by talking to each other and going to see movies and help her out by showing her you care. Its horrible that her parenst think shes a screw up but you can give your friend the love and support she never got from her parents. For now stay clear of her so called "boyfriend" so you won't get tangled up with his bad ways! I really never experienced this so i don't know first hand how to handle this though.I hope i helped a little bit.
claire
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Rating: 5
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Thanks, you did help. I'll make sure she knows I care. =)
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