I love helping people out and I feel great giving advice to people out there I don't even know. It gives me great personal satisfaction knowing that the answers I give are pretty damn good. I have a cheery personality and I like art and music. I am not religious, but have a clear view of spirituality. I will never grow up completely, I clearly remember what it's like to be a teen, but now I have a much better perspective on how to get through it all because let me tell you, I have BEEN through it all. Glad to help any way I can...
Gender: Female
Location: New Hampshire
Occupation: homemaker:mommy
Age: 24
Member Since: October 18, 2004
Answers: 132
Last Update: January 9, 2005
Visitors: 9550
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ok so my ex boyfriend and i have been on and off for a little over 4 years. i did see other people in between but its not the same. he has been my best friend for what seems to be my whole life. i have been able to go to him for everything. well a year ago November we got back together and things were great. he means everything to me. i love him more then anything and i know that he truly loves me.. however things got rough this past September and we broke up again. i dumped him. but we promised to be best friends still. for a while things were still great. like we still hooked up and kissed and everything but i don't want to be friends with benefits. but i cant help it when im with him. so last week the week of November 15th was great. we hung out Monday, Wednesday(what would have been 1 year) and then Saturday. Wednesday was the best. i mean he told me he loved me and everything but then Saturday he was a jerk. we hooked up and i told him i loved him and hes like i know u do. but was gay about it. he ended up leaving shortly after. then we didn't talk all week. till i called him Friday upset needing someone to talk to and he couldn't be there for me. then on Saturday i told him again that i really needed him and hes like well im busy. BLAH! i cant take this anymore. its like he cares about me but he doesn't show it. he never calls me anymore like he promised he would and like how tings were b4 we got back together. what should i do? im not happy anymore. i want to express myself to him and tell him how im hurting but i don't know how to. i don't want to stop talking to him cause he has always been my best friend but its like i have too. i don't know what to do. please help me! (link)
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It seems like you're the only one who wants to try to take things seriously and play no more games but he's not putting as much effort as you. Who knows what he's thinking. But you have a way into his head. Just try talking to him. This seems like one confusing relationship which is why, myself, I never stuck around for those kinds because it's more of a commitment rollercoaster that is more work than worth it. It's up to you, keep trying and chasing if you like, but it may not end very soon. And it could feel like a very long dragged out ending. I hope not, so you guys need to talk and talk about things that matter like how much work is he willing to put into your relationship weather it's friends or more and how you don't want to deal with the back and forth anymore, that it's too much. At that point you can't start pointing fingers at each other though, or it's going to be an endless circle of the blame game. And on your part take it back a notch with that reading into every mood he has. He is human with ups and downs, so are you. If you are such good best friends then you know that best friends are willing and able to work through things but also to give each other some breathing room and room to grow and become. Finding the strength to allow that is being a good friend in itself. On top of that, a good friendship is a solid foundation for a beautiful boy/girl relationship. I hope I helped a little. Hope everthing smoothes out for you:)****
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Rating: 5
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thank you so much for the advice. that really did help alot- you put things into place
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