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Member Since: November 27, 2004
Answers: 22
Last Update: December 2, 2004
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I've had this crush on this girl for quite some time. It's gotten to the point where I'll buy stuff I don't really need, nor do I really want, just to talk to her. She always seems happy to see me and always gives me a big hug before I leave. The problem is I have no idea how old she is. I'm not the type of guy who judges people who date younger or older people, but it seems to worry my when I'm involved. I'm 20, what if she's only 15 or 16. She looks and kind of acts young, so I'm worried. What do you think the dating age limit should be for someone like myself?
The other problem. Earlier today, I saw scars and cuts on her rist. It doesn't look like something an accident would have caused. I know she can't really die from cuts on arm, but the scars aren't exactly good for her either. How should I go about asking her where they're from? Is it even my business to ask such a question? What if she obviously lies to me about the scars origins? Should I just drop it then or what? (link)
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If you're over 18, then you should not be dating anyone under 18. Legally, you could get yourself into trouble. Plus, it's just kinda creepy for a 20-year old to be dating a 15-year old. In your question, you seem to be uncomfortable with dating someone that young. Go with your instincts. Remember what you were like when you were 15? There is a big difference emotionally between a 15, or 16-year old and a 20-year old. Plus, if you have sex with a girl under 18, that's rape. Even if she consents. In some states, if an adult has sex with a minor under 16 it's also considered child abuse.
So, if you want to ask this girl out, just ask her how old she is.
As far as the scars and cuts on her wrist-- you don't know where they are from. It sounds like you don't know her well, yet her cuts and scars are pretty easy to see when you see her. If she has been cutting herself, she would probably try hard to hide the evidence. Maybe I've misunderstood, and she is a friend of yours. You could ask her about it. Just keep it low-key-- "I noticed your scars and cuts on your wrists. Did you have an accident? Are you OK?" But if you don't know her, except in passing at the store where she works, then that would be an awkward question to ask. Of course, if she is in trouble, and needs someone to notice her and help her, an awkward question doesn't seem all that bad, does it?
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Rating: 5
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Thanks, that's the type of answer I was hoping for. 15 or 16 is what I picture as the youngest she could possibly be. Hopefully she's older, sometimes it's hard to tell. Really, she looks and acts just as old as some of my 19-20 year old friends, it's just last year I asked her age and she didn't give me a clear answer. You'd think that she would if she was over 18 then. Hopefully she's over 18 now.
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