Member Since: April 19, 2021
Answers: 179
Last Update: June 27, 2022
Visitors: 7613
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Right before Holidaze break of 2019, the people who are majors and minors of my department in college all went to our department chair’s home and did the usual Xmas gift exchange thing. I’m in the theater department, so of course there are all kinds of crazy gifts (including a brand new cue ball, like the kind that goes with a pool table) and all kinds of swapping. I got the gift from this older gay guy named Jeremy. It was a roll of toilet paper which had pictures of Jeremy on every sheet, and it was on both sides of the toilet paper (like alternating, one picture on the outside of one sheet and the next sheet has the picture on the other side.) Jeremy said that he wanted to give a gift that “people could actually use”. He had peeled the backing paper off of the pictures before he put them on there so the pictures were really soft, like regular toilet paper. I asked him before we all left the party if he really wanted me to use it and he said “absolutely!”, which was so crazy but that’s kinda how he was-wild, crazy, unrestrained, beautiful, and epic. I accidentally left the roll of toilet paper with his pictures on it in my college apartment when I went to my parents house for Xmas or else I would have started using it over the Holidaze break.
Over the Holidaze break however, about two weeks after the party, Jeremy was driving over a hundred miles per hour and hit a bunch of trees after hydroplaning. He passed away instantly. (He had a habit of driving by himself at crazy speeds on back country roads; he always said that doing that was his happy place.)
At the memorial service, I tried to give the roll of toilet paper from the party to Jeremy’s boyfriend, but he said that he just wasn’t able emotionally to take it and he thought that since I had gotten it at the party, Jeremy would have wanted me to have it. I wanted to give it to Jeremy’s family, but then I thought about how awkward it would have been with them not knowing me and me handing them a roll of toilet paper with pictures of their passed away son glued onto every sheet.
So now it’s been about two years now and I don’t know what to do. We weren’t super close but we had a lot of cool memories being part of the same group of friends doing college together. He put in too much work making it to just chuck it in the trash. I don’t really have room for it though and it’s a pretty weird thing to have. Normally I try to be pretty minimalist but this one item is super difficult because of the story.
What do you think please? (link)
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You are under no obligation to save this more than unusual gift, regardless of whether the giver is deceased, or not. And since it doesn't appear to have any sentimental value for you, fee free to dispose of it.You have tried to give it to others who might want it, and found that they didn't .So, you are now free to do with it as you desire.
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So, I like a boy. He seems to have a lot of interest in me, and I like him too. But here’s the problem. He says he likes someone else, but also shows that he likes me as well. I’m confused and he’s confusing my brain. I truly don’t know what to do but I like him a lot (link)
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He can and does like more than one person, at least you and one other. At least he is honest with you, and that's a plus. Exclusive relationships will be in your future, just not now, yet, or at least, with him. As for what you should do? Bide your time. When you are young, relationships tend to come and go very quickly. Meanwhile, be your natural, friendly self, don't worry so much about him, keep busy, and either he'll eventually become more available...or, he won't, and life will go on !
Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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I’ve been dealing with an annoying neighbor for over a year. He used to wake me up with his alarm. That has since stopped but he’s louder than the other neighbors that lived there before him. Honestly, I never heard them at all. Granted some people are more quiet than others. But, I also think the thin walls play a role. So, when October came I was for sure he would have been moved out or evicted because the property manager came to his door asking for rent shortly after he moved in which was sometime in October. Than, maybe a few months ago there was a note left on his door. So, I assumed he’d been gone my now since it’s been a year. I can’t imagine they will allow someone to renew their lease if they have noise complaints and past due rent. The irony in all of the while I was waiting for him to move I should have moved. I just was hoping this would be the last month dealing with him.
Just wondering how I got here (link)
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You got "here" by waiting and hoping and expecting what failed to materialize. Its sometimes difficult to get rid of an unwanted tenant, because of laws.
And perhaps the manager or owner also had hopes of improvements. At least, they didn't have to worry about being disturbed, like you did.
So, the question remains: what do you wish to do now? And what are your options? Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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Would allowing my 15-year-old daughter to visit her mom who will be in jail for 7 months for check fraud be a bad idea even if they have a good relationship since then she will see the inside of a jail and prisoners? Not to mention her mom in a jumpsuit. My daughter would like to go and seems enthusiastic and my wife says bring her if she wants but I’m not sure
Actually my daughter does not seem scared but instead seems excited and enthusiastic to visit. This is strange to me. Do you find this normal? My daughter seems to find the idea of her mom having to wearing a uniform, sharing a room funny. I wonder why she would think it is funny. My wife says bring her if she would like to and my daughter says she would like to but I don't know if it is a good idea. She hasn't gone yet so we can still discuss it together.
Thinking I will take her. But there is no doubt my daughter will want to ask her mom questions about what it is like to share a cell and if she has to take showers with other people. Is that appropriate for a 15 year old?
(link)
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This question was dated in September 2021, but I do remember it being posted months ago . I may have even answered it then. It appears you haven't received the answer you were looking for, or perhaps you are posting again for some other reason. How can we best help you? Dr. Stephanie
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So, I'm asexual but my boyfriend is not. I've already told him about it, and we're both fine with it, but we haven't actually talked about the sex part of our relationship yet. I'm not interested in having sex at all, but I'm wondering what I can do instead in case if he still needs SOMETHING?
And also, how should I bring it up to him to talk about?
-Cas, 26 (link)
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If you are not on the same pages then it might be a bit presumptious to consider him as your "boyfriend" rather than a friend or even a best friend. This sounds like a relatively new relationship , still in progress of developing, right? In case he "still needs something", there's little you can do about it, other than to accept things as they are. You may well end up being his friend rather than his girlfriend, so decide if that's comfortable enough for you, as he will also need to decide. Expect that he will move on in the romance department to someone who is on the same page as himself. And as for how you talk to him about this, you simply raise the subject for open and honest discussion and take it from there. Good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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why are people afraid to get tested for AIDS or HIV? (link)
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It is common for people to avoid learning the truth about something, for fear of what they may find. Instead, they hide their fears away, deny reality, and hope the problem goes away. Its a very bad way to go when it comes to getting tested for AIDS or HIV, as early treatment can save lives.
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I'm 17 years of age,am from nigeria,i do have this(sexual urge)in the mist of guys
What can i do to stop it? (link)
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Thank you for including your age, I wish you had also given us your gender. At seventeen, it is not surprising that you are feeling strong sexual urges, and you are not alone in this regard.
Without knowing more about your situation, I can only advise you of these options:
*You can leave the situation and use masturbation to relieve your own strong sexual urges. No harm done.
*You can act out and arrange to engage in sex with the "guy" or "guys" of your choice, if they are willing. In this case, you had better be sure that you are practicing "safe sex", which means birth control if you are female, that you are with a healthy disease free partner no matter what gender you or they may be, and that you are willing to have sex without any further involvement such as first developing a relationship. Without knowing how well you know these other "guys", its difficult to warn you about choosing a partner that is also emotionally safe to be with, that is, someone who may be kind, sensitive, concerned about both of your well beings, etc.
So you see, it gets complicated, doesn't it.
To answer your question directly, i.e., what you can do "to stop it", meaning , I assume, your sexual urges, I doubt if you can do much about that. Its normal enough.
Good luck and good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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I want to go to a party but I have no one to go with. I could ask my roommate but she’s studying and Idk how to ask her. My friend said I could hit her up anytime to go with her to a party but she already left and I don’t want to invite myself. But I could. What do I do? (link)
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Instead of "inviting yourself", which is really bad form, contact the person or persons throwing the party and ask them if it would be all right for you to attend and whether you could come alone or not.
Its easier to have a friend to go with, of course. But there are also advantages to going solo, one being that you are more open and available to meet and socialize with others, and another is that you can leave whenever you want to go.
You can also practice socializing and learn some skills , which you might not do as much, if you were with a partner.
From your description, it sounds as if its too late , or was too late, to ask your friend in any case. But if the party hasn't already happened, consider this to be both an opportunity and a challenge to grow, learn something, and to do the right thing. Good luck and good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
Good luck and good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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Today was very usual for me, I had 2 girls who barely talk to me ask to be my friend almost simultaneously. I accepted only one of the girls offer, and so my question lies with the other girl. The other girl whose offer I have not accepted is a cousin to someone who bullied me a couple of years ago, me, the girl, and her cousin all rode the same bus which is where the bullying mostly took place. So she of course bore witness to the bullying, while I do not remember if she ever partook in it or said anything to me I am still skeptical of her friendship request because not only is she related to my past bully but I have no clue if she has any other intentions besides becoming a genuine friend to me. She scarcely speaks to me and so her suddenly asking me if I would like to be friends is brow raising, she doesn’t seem like the girls who I’ve often sparked a friendship with in the past and I don’t know her personality too well to determine if she has a hidden agenda nor am I familiar with agreeing to become friends with someone without having to get to know them first . What exactly should I to do? (link)
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You are suspecting she is not really friendship material, in view of your prior experiences with bullying . However , you can't substantiate that she had anything to do with it, other than being related to an identified bully.
You are also suspicious of the fact that she has had no history of being friendly with you and hasn['t behaved like previous friends of yours. But, she did reach out. And truly, you have nothing to back up your mistrust of her that holds water.
I'd have to say that it sounds like you are extremely protective of yourself, perhaps because of the bullying experiences, or whatever, but that you are erecting barriers of mistrust whether first warranted, or not. And if you continue, it will be your loss as well as that of others.\
If you give her the chance to get to know you, and for you to know her as well, then you can each decide whether you wish to be friends or not. And this is what I would advise. Good luck and good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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I have a girlfriend that I love a lot, but I've also fallen for another person. I love both of them and I don't know what to do. This new person is stuck in my head but I know they don't like me the same way.
What do I do? (link)
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When you say you don't know what to do...what choices are you considering? Next time,it would also be helpful if you had included your ages.
You say the new person doesn't return your feelings, so that ought to guide you away from them and toward the one who does.
However, if you are falling for more than one, the indication is that you aren't ready for an exclusive relationship with either one.
Instead, while you may feel you are "in love", you should not limit yourself to an exclusive relationship until much later on. Just remember to be honest with the girl(s) that you are seeing, and try to enjoy the relationship(s), while not deceiving anyone or giving impressions that you cannot live up to.
Good wishes, ~Dr. Stephanie
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My friend made a very offhand racist comment the other day that she totally didn't mean, and it was just like, something that slipped out of her mouth, but sort of betrayed her internalized prejudice. It wasn't a huge deal, but I was offended because she had made a racist comment towards my culture. On Saturday, we went out to dinner with our friend group, and I brought it up just to say hey, that was kind of racist and offended me since it was about my culture, so can you be a little more aware about your words. She took it badly, and got really defensive, and I told her I wasn't blaming her, it was just very shocking and offensive towards me even if it wasn't intentional. She eventually said that yeah, she understood, but proceeded to act eztremely passive aggressive towards me, like excluding me from pictures we took that night and making snide comments about anything I said throughout the night. Even one of my other friends picked up on it and found it off-putting. I don't really know how to act around her now, because while we were really close and did practically everything together, she was also the kind of friend that was a little insensitive about things and hard to go to for anything serious. Should I not have brought jt up at dinner? Maybe texted her about it instead of bringing it up face to face? What was the right thing to do? (link)
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You may have been right to share your feelings with her, but you were wrong to bring it up publicly in the presence of others. I would have recommended a face to face conversation rather than texting, as well.
So it may be that each of you owes the other an apology; you, for publicly criticizing and shaming her, her for making offensive and racist comments to you.
If you can still have that conversation, perhaps your friendship can be salvaged. If not, time to move on, but hopefully, with learning on both sides.
Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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My long distance boyfriend of 2 years is often losing himself. He has numerous mental disorders, and struggles with them daily. He often provokes fights when he drinks and generally has a lot of anger that builds up. This weekend, he is going to a party and so am i, he wants to get smashed and talked about this one asshole he wants to beat up, he also said he might kill him. Knowing him, he will, he wont hesitate if he wants to. But i also wanted to drink and im not sure if i should or stay home incase something happens to him. (link)
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Honey, yes, you should definitely stay home ! You know he is unstable, prone to violence, and you already believe he is capable of harming someone else. He is also probably an alcoholic, by the broadest definition of "any time it causes a problem", at the very least.
He has anger issues, and what you call "numerous mental disorders". Your question should not be whether to go to a party and drink,(which isn't a good idea given that he'll be there and what you['ve foreseen!), that's microscopic compared with the much larger question: why are you still with him? !
He is troubled, potentially violent, suicidally depressed and I heard nothing about him either seeking or being in some form of therapy, which is sorely needed.
Your best bet would be to distance yourself even further from your long distance boyfriend, and make it permanent. You cannot help him, other than to encourage him to seek professional help, including a suicide prevention hotline, (1 800 273-1255, which is available 24/7 and free.)
I can foresee nothing good for you about staying in this relationship. But if you do decide to continue, then I would also have to ask what issues you , yourself, may have, that prevent you from "coming in out of the rain". And please, just saying "But I love him!" doesn't cut the mustard.
This is a situation in which my best advice will be to make your own present and future well being your topmost priority, and it won't be the case, as long as you stay with him.
Lastly, if you are worried that he'll kill himself if you break up with him, as people sometimes threaten, do not accept any responsibility for his choices. You can neither cause nor prevent someone from destroying themself, it is their choice alone.
Good luck and good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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So there are these twin boys who are in my last period. One is more preferably social since I see people usually talk to and hold conversation with him more than the other brother who is rather reserved and only speaks when spoken to. Well at least from what I’ve seen in that case, keep in mind I only have one class with them and don’t sit near them. From my POV I see myself in the brother who is more quiet and would like to become acquainted with him! I’ve observed a number of similarities between me and him and I need ways to get closer to him or talk to him in some kind of way. I am not one to speak first also I only speak when spoken to, it seems he is the same so does anybody have any tips or tricks to help me make a new friend? (link)
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Yes: if both of you are the kind who don't speak until spoken to, its going to be very quiet between the two of you, unless and until one of you gets your courage up and learns how to initiate a conversation !
The best way I know how to do this is to express your interest in almost anything about the other person and ask them a question or two, one answer leading to another inquiry. People love to talk about themselves, even non-talkers will be flattered that you show an interest.
Become the best listener in the whole world! You will be surprised at how many will appreciate you for doing this.
The choice is yours: either you will have to learn how to speak first on occasion, such as this one, or be left alone with the sounds of silence.
Good luck! Dr. Stephanie
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I don't really know how to start, so I'm just gonna jump right in. Let's say that I am the mother of seven beautiful, wonderful, amazing, talented children including six boys and one girl. We were gonna quit after the fourth child, but we're surprised by a set of triplets There's hardly a day that goes by that I don't feel like a bad mother. I deal with guilt and self hatred almost on a daily basis because of it.
There are so many things that make me feel like a bad mom. I'm always worried about how well I'm raising my children. They're good kids. They're all well behaved, well mannered, kind, loving, compassionate, selfless, generous people. People compliment me on how sweet my children are and every time, I wonder how much credit I can take for it. Yes, I did always try to raise them to have all of those qualities, but sometimes I think I just got lucky with naturally good kids and a husband who knew how to raise them well. I don't have much confidence in myself to successfully raise them to be so great.
I constantly feel inadequate and inferior as a mother. I worry if my children get enough attention from me, if they always feel loved by me, if they ever feel neglected or if ever do overlook a need one of them has, if I can always protect them and keep them healthy, and if I'm doing anything that could damage them. I feel like I simply don't deserve them and like they need and deserve a better mother. I can't even provide them with health insurance. They're on my husband's insurance because the museum I work for doesn't make enough money to provide it's employees with benefits. If anything happens to my husband and one of my children falls I'll or is in an accident, we're up a creek without a paddle.
My husband and I are apparently prone to multiple births as our first two children were a set of fraternal twin boys, Aaron and Corbin. Today was Corbin's birthday and yesterday was Aaron's. Aaron was born just before midnight on October 20. and Corbin came just after midnight on October 21. Long story short, we didn't have much of a chance to celebrate Aaron's birthday. My dad's birthday was Friday and we had his party on Saturday. We were busy all day Sunday with Church stuff and important errands, so although he got a special dinner the night of his birthday, that wasn't enough for me to feel like he'd gotten a good enough birthday. He wanted to go to a certain store this evening and look at their elaborate Christmas decorations. They always decorate for Christmas way early and Aaron loves anything to do with Christmas, so he wanted to celebrate his birthday by take a long walk around that store, but I had to tell him that we couldn't today because it was Corbin's birthday. I promised we would tomorrow, but Corbin had to be in charge of our plans for this evening.
Now here's the thing that prompted me to come to this site tonight. Aaron was disappointed that we couldn't go to that store tonight and jealous that his brother was having a better birthday than he'd had. I felt guilty about the way Aaron's birthday turned out and I felt resentful of the situation. At that time, just for a moment, a short, short moment that I deeply regret and am ashamed of. I felt myself almost resenting Corbin for being the reason I couldn't give Aaron what he wanted for his birthday today. I didn't mean to. I couldn't control it, it just happened. It wasn't a deep resentment, it was extremely mild one and it wasn't one where I felt even the tiniest bit of hatred for Corbin. I still loved him as much as always and I didn't wish in that moment that I'd never had him or anything like that, but I can't get over the fact that even for a second, I resented my own son for something that wasn't even his fault.
A lot of people think that resentment is synonymous with hatred, but it's not. The internet defines resentment as a feeling of displeasure or indignation at a remark, act, person, etc. regarded as causing insult or injury. It's possible to feel displeased with or indignant about something or someone without hating that something or someone. I honestly have never hated one of my children. I've always loved Corbin more than I could ever express even in that one tiny moment of resentment, but I can't forgive myself for feeling that way. Even though many people misunderstand what resentment is, it's still not a feeling you're supposed to have towards your own child or children. I absolutely hate the thought of how Corbin would feel if he knew about this. He is so extremely precious to me, the last thing in the world I'd ever want to do is hurt him.
My biggest problem is that I wish I could say that this is the first time this has ever happened, but it's not. I had another very mild, unintentional moment of resentment towards my sons, Daniel and Josh once for something that would take too long to explain, but was a stupid reason to feel that way. I kind of resented Aaron tonight for being the reason I resented Corbin. I once resented my son, Mitch for making an insensitive joke about a tragedy that embarrassed me a little in front of people. Most ridiculously, I resented my son, Gage for being too awesome and making my other children feel inferior. Who resents their child for being too awesome? My resentment never lasts long. It lasts about literally one second and then it's replaced with terrible guilt and remorse. I've never hated any of them or wished them away or anything like that, but I still feel so bad about this. People tell me that it's normal to resent your children or any other loved ones at one time or another, but I don't see how it can be.
I'm a terrible, terrible mother. I hate myself so much sometimes and I know I do not deserve my children. I love them so much and I want to deserve them, but I've lost faith in myself to ever do so. What am I gonna do? How can I ever live with myself after this? How can I live with knowing I don't deserve my children? How can I deal with knowing I suck as a mother?
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If I read it right, you are awfully hard on yourself. You say your kids are good, they're healthy, they're covered by their father's insurance, etc.,and yet you continually put yourself down, are fearful, and stressed out. Well, who wouldn't be stressed, with seven kids to raise all at once !
You have a lot of anxiety going on. You ar prone to self-blame, even when unwarranted. Get into coun- seling. Get into group therapy, where you can receive both support and honest feedback from others, who will probably see you as better than you see yourself right now.
Don't just let this go, because your stress and anxiety will be picked up by the kids and affect them negatively. Indeed, you may be teaching them to feel the same way.
So, good luck and good wishes, now go and take care of this? Dr. Stephanie
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Hi everyone. I'm 24/f and my bf is 28. So a very hurtful thing happened to me. I was with my boyfriend for 3 years and then I found out that he cheated on me with his ex-girlfriend and got her pregnant. And the worst part is that he lied about it for so long. I didn't find out until the child was already 1 year old! So I broke up with him, it was very devastating because I loved him and thought we were going to get married. He was my first serious bf. He said it was just a mistake and that he was really drunk that night, and that he still loves me. Anyway, I didn't talk to him for about two years even though he kept trying to reach out to me. After a while I decided to talk to him again, and he really seemed like he changed. He was very loving and sweet, and he said he wanted us to get back together. I still loved him and I don't think I ever really got over him. So I said ok, we can take things slow. So we started dating again, and I started to feel happy again. He told me that he wasn't involved with anyone else and that we were exclusive. We've been dating for over a year and he even asked me to move in with him. Everything was going well, until one day he just started acting really distant again. So I kept asking what was wrong and he blurted out that he had gotten another girl pregnant and that she had the baby this past April! I was like what the hell? He told me that he was afraid to tell me because he knew I would break up with him. I don't know how he could have done something like this again and not say a word even though we've been dating for over a year. And I have no idea who this girl is. Now he has two kids with two different women, and I have none. I wasn't really able to express myself the last time we talked because I was in such shock. We haven't spoken in over a month, and while I've been here crying and feeling sad, he hasn't even reached out to me. He hasn't called me since then. I don't know what to do. I feel heartbroken. Should I curse him out and tell him how I feel or just let it go? I'm trying not to think about him but I feel really hurt inside and it seems like he doesn't even care. How could he do this to me twice when he says he loves me? Any advice? (link)
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He may "love" you, but apparently that doesn't stop him from lying and cheating, and from being a "baby daddy" to multiple partners, not you. He could do this twice, to answer your question, because he is irresponsible, a liar and a cheater, which should be recognized and accepted as reality by you.
This should help you decide what to do next: do you want to share him with others now and in the future? A tiger doesn't change his stripes and i would expect the same from him.
If your answer is "NO!" , which is what it should be, it will help you to let go of him by reminding yourself frequently that the person you thought you loved and that loved you is not whom he really is. I think you can then tell yourself that the real person doesn't deserve to be loved by you...and the sooner you get on with your life without him, the better off you will be.
"Cursing him out" may help you feel better, but its actually a form of continuing your involvement with him. Is that what you want to do?
Consider yourself lucky. You put in a lot of years and time with him, but what if you had married him and become saddled with kids, and THEN learned about all this???! I think its time for you to move on...what do YOU think?!
Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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I have a bf and I cheated on him with his best friend. He loves me and I too love him but this thing is stuck in his head and he needs my help how can I help him forget this thing. The thinks that if he leave me ever think will be okay but we cannot be without each other what shall I do I'm really sorry for the mistake (link)
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There is only one thing you can do at this point, besides apologizing: and that's don't do it again. Be honest. Be open . Allow him to check on you whenever he has doubts or insecurities, since you will have nothing to hide. Then wait, for as long as it may take, for him to forgive you and to get over this.
He may or he may not get over it. No matter what happens, take this as a learning experience, which will help you decide how to be in relationships from now on.
Good luck and good wishes,
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So I have this friend, who I set up with my other friend. He and I aren't super close, but recently we've gotten closer because he's dating my close friend now. There's not really a problem, but I'm just super confused about how he's been acting. He and my other friend have been dating for about 4-5 weeks now? And he's already said I love you, and asked her to take that step too (he was very gentlemanly about it, didn't pressure her, that's not the problem). The problem is that just a week before she confessed to him, he told me that he was crushing on another girl from his church, and he seemed pretty smitten too, but he wasn't going to do anything about it and he claimed that he was fine just being friends with her. The next day, he told me that he had feelings for me last year, when we first met. I was dating someone when he told me this, and I knew my friend liked him so I sort of just acted surprised, and laughed it off. He claimed he was over his feelings for me, but after my relationship ended badly, obviously, I complained to all my friends about it, including him, and I kept getting the feeling that he still liked me. He didn't really like my boyfriend, and even made a bet with my friend on how short the relationship would last. He also, while I was complaining about my ex, said things like how he wouldn't be like that in a relationship, and described what he would be like in a relationship, which was basically MY ideal relationship about which I had been describing to all my friends because I had learned my lesson from my train wreck of a previous relationship. He's also very artistic and good with his hands and kept insisting on gifting me handmade carvings and jewelry even though I had turned it down a bunch of times. I was getting kind of suspicious so I told my friend, who was crushing HARD on him, but she didn't really seem to care, because soon after, she confessed to him. When I asked him about how he felt about her, he told me, and I quote, "Idk, but I don't want to ruin a chance at romance." Which okay, fair, he wants to try it out before he decides, but also CONCERNING??? Because my close friend was totally whipped and really liked him. So they start dating, but even then, they don't really act like boyfriend and girlfriend, more like best friends. She initiates everything, and he didn't object to any of it, but didn't really seem interested in romance. They went on one date, and then suddenly he texts her "love you" somewhere in their conversation I don't know the exact context. But also, I'm talking to this new guy, and he HATES him too! I'm not so self-centered to think that just that means he likes me still, but he's disliked BOTH guys I've dated/am talking to. It's not like he just hates this guy specifically. He actually denied disliking my ex, but also insulted him and made a bet on how long our relationship would last, so... And then out of the blue, after 1 date and a couple of group hangouts, he's telling my friend that he loves her? Where did that even come from??? I find it hard to believe that his feelings changed that fast, or that he actually loves her, because, um, we're in high school and they've only been dating for a couple of weeks. And then school let out and they haven't seen each other except at MY birthday party. Can someone just explain to me how his emotions could possibly have taken a complete 180? Is this normal? What is even happening? (link)
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You asked how this could be happening and whether its normal? Well, for young teens, like thirteen, yeah, curshing and the "L word" and sudden changes, its not unheard of. You said high school? Well, even then...but even so, its a sign of immaturity and inexperience, certainly suggesting that no one else should rely upon this person for any longer term relationships or committments, etc.
Hopefully, for himself as well as others, this boy will eventually mature a little more and grow out of this very early stage in relationships.
Meanwhile, no one should take however he feels that seriously, since next week, it could be completely different.
My question to you is why are you taking so much of your own time and energy to focus on him ? surely, you might have more meaningful and interesting subjects of your own? Unless, you, too, are in that stage of focusing intensely on immediate relationships and their meanings, which is a normal part of teen age experience and growth. If so, you also will have some growing and maturing to do, which in time, will naturally occur. Good wishes, Dr. Stephanie
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I'm interviewing for a night PRN position at a hospital as a patient screener. I'm not if I'll get a lot of work hours every month because it's "as needed."
I'm thinking about this job because I really want to work in a hospital and move up to other positions for what I went to school for. But it is PRN and I have bills to pay. (link)
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I wish you had included what your schooling was and whether you graduated. A "PRN" position needs defining, at least for me: did you mean "Practical Registered Nurse", or.........?
You should be able to ask during your interviews what the starting salary would be. You can also get a ball park idea by asking on line.
Because you are only applying for a part time "as needed" position, there are probably few, if any, benefits included and you'll be receiving an hourly wage, which doesn't sound to me like something that could sufficiently sustain your economic needs, and certainly provides little job security as well.
If you are viewing this as a chance to improve your resume for future positions, that could still be an advantage worth seeking, IF you can afford to do so.
Does "PRN" have to do with hours as needed, rather than a job title?
Next time you write, please spell out whatever you've abbreviated, to help us better understand and advise you. Thank you.
Good luck, Dr. Stephanie
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I'm a 16 year old girl and last night I wet the bed. Who the fuck still wets the bed when they're in high school??!?? Me, apparently. And this isn't the first time, it's the second. The first time was last month. Fortunately, no one knows about this (and hopefully it'll stay that way). But I know something must be wrong for this to be happening. I don't know what though. I'm not losing bladder control when I'm awake. It's only when I'm asleep. So what does that mean? Help!!!! (link)
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First, you may think you're the "only one", but you're not. True, small children sometimes have this problem, but not exclusively.
You could have either an emotional or physical reason that's being expressed in this manner. So, I would start with a checkup at your doctor's office. Take it from there...this may be relatively easy to resolve.
Meanwhile, so as to avoid doing a lot of laundering of bedsheets, try wearing some "Depends" to bed, until this gets fully resolved.
Good wishes, good luck ! ~Dr. Stephanie
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Thank god for anonimity. I have a sex doll and yesterday my roomate begged me to go get him beer. Since I didn't want him drinking and driving I decided to be nice and go get it for him. I have a camera in my room and I checked it and while I was gone, he came into my room and screwed around with my dool and jerked off to it. I didn't see anything on her, but maybe he was wearing a condom, cause you can hear on the video that he got off. I came home and he was all chatty and friendly and thankful for getting his beer. Talking to me like nothing.
I want to make him pay for the doll its pretty much new and now he's defiled it. I don't even wanna touch it, let alone screw it. He ruined it for me and I want to make him buy it off me at full price. I wonder if there is a way to do that? I could say "pay me for what you stole from me, or your ex and kids are gonna see that video." But, that could blow up in my face.
I want him to pay for it, but he will probably refuse. Dunno what to do, take him to court over $700? (link)
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There's an old saying: "Anybody can sue anyone for anything." But , then comes the matter of winning, and after that, trying to collect whatever damages you've been rewarded. In this instance, I would strongly advise you not to try and do this. First, your case would probably be thrown out as being frivolous.
Your thougts of how to get even or threaten your room mate would most likely bring greater problems back on you, if you decided to try doing what you've planned.
Neither you, nor your room mate sound like anyone who would be a good choice to live with , since there is deception, using someone else's belongings without permission, spying, vengeful feelings, hostility, etc.
The whole situation , to begin with, is bizarre. My advice to you is to let this go. And then, move elsewhere and live alone: problem solved .
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