My Mom passed away in my mid-childhood. Greatly influenced by my Aunt and her midwestern social circles. Have normally been a loner with a few distinct circles of friends with the exception of one best friend for years after high school.
Location: Raleigh, NC, USA, Earth, Sol, Milkyway
Occupation: Technical problem solver
Age: 39
Member Since: October 13, 2003
Answers: 11
Last Update: January 24, 2006
Visitors: 1312
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My girlfriend shuts off all communication when I confront her with important issues regarding our relationship, like not as much spontaneous openness & sex now as in the beginning ? (link)
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Comparing the early relationship to the way it is now might be a bad way to go about it.
A lot of relationships start off with a different vibe due to all of the excitement of discovery of each other.
Instead, try to introduce new aspects of yourself to her and see if that sparks some interest and renewed spontaneity. Try not to do this with an agenda. Try to keep it light and fun -- to see what happens.
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How do I keep my hair from getting staticy in the winter? (link)
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You will probably laugh but, this is probably an excellent use of old (or new) Bounce (tm) or similar dryer sheets. Just rub your hair with it. (I am not sure if it might damage your hair chemically though.)
http://comfortcorner.hypermart.net/dsheets.html
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I'm not really a social person, even though I do like having friends. The problem is that sometimes they call me up and I just don't feel like going out, and they get all insulted about the fact that I'd rather curl up with a book than party with them. I have a lot more "me" time than the average person, and I like it that way, but they don't get it. I've lied to them about other stuff going on but feel bad about that. How can I tell them I'm not in a going out mood without hurting their feelings? (link)
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Counter with another date you can plan to be in the mood to go out.
If you are a regular scheduler, then they will figure out that Every Third Tuesday is good time to ask you.
If you are unpredictable (as you understand yourself here), then they will just have to figure to keep trying with you.
An outright turndown will eventually leave you with few to no invitations from them.
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I'm a girl, and I kinda like to bake stuff, because hey, it means I get desert. My question is this: I work with all guys. If I bake cookies or something and bring them into work, are the guys going to stop feeling like I'm "one of them" and start seeing me as this betty crocker homemaker type? We're all pretty laid back now, on the same level and everything, I don't want it to get weird. (link)
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I think it is all in the presentation. If you just have them in a box wrapped in wax paper and happen to pull them out while in another conversation, it probably will not be such a big deal. Then they will probably rave over them tasting homemade, etc.
If they are on a platter and all Martha Stewart in presentation, then yeah, welcome to the homemaker world.
On a whole though, it would be cool in and of itself just to have fresh homemade cookies no matter who has time to make them. I cannot see them making a separation judgement based off of your superior cooking skills. Envy maybe, but not putting you off.
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I heard this ad on the radio for these parties... they're like tupperware parties, where women get together and buy stuff... only we're buying sex toys instead. Since I've got all these boring married coworker gals who are always inviting me to their make-up parties and kitchen selling things, I was thinking of setting up a sex toy party.
I'm totally serious.
Would this be a bad thing to do with co-workers? What exactly is a sex toy party? If I call the shop that's offering this thing will I get suckered into some awful deal my friends will never forgive me for? (link)
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You know, on one hand this sounds fun. On the other, I wonder how many of your co-workers would think you were making a pass?
I would say bring it up over lunch within a group if you are serious about it; especially if the jokes and conversation kind of edge its way around to sex stuff. Of course, if it never has come up in the past, then maybe this group is too uptight about it.
This just might be the next refreshing breakout this world needs!
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I just got a new job and the health care system is weird. I can choose to either pay $30 a month or $15 a month. If I pay $30 a month, the company pays for all my health care over $1600, if I spend more than that in the year. If I pay $15 a month, the company doesn't start paying until after $2800. I'm healthy and don't think I'll need more than $1600 for the year, so I think I might go with the cheap plan and save on my monthly payments. But I'll be screwed if something happens to me, like I fall off a bridge and need $4000 surgery, because I'll have to spend $2800 total instead of $1600. What would you do? (link)
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Should something happen you have to pay at least $1600 either way. So, you need to be ready to pay that already
Let us say you will not have an health problem until the 12th month.
the $30.00 way:
You need to pay and save $164.00 ($30 + $134)
the $15.00 way:
You need to pay and save $249.00 ($15 + $234)
each month to be ready by that month.
Usually these systems allow you to change your choice annually. It would be best if the first year you went the $30.00 / month route AND saved up for the $2800 so that next year:
the $30.00 way one year:
you pay and save $164.00 ($30 + $134) to gain a savings balance of $1608. Next opportunity change to the $15 plan. Then you have $2800 - $1608 = $1192 left to add to savings. You also have more saving power since you will not be spending $30 but $15.
2nd year you pay and save $115 ($15 + $100) to get to the balance of: $2808 = $1608 (saved last year) + $1200 (saved in second year).
Note 1: even if you get injured the 2nd month of the second year your total additional money you need to pay out should only be $1192 since you have $1608 already in the bank!
Note 2: You will be earning interest on your $1608 so the balance will actually be higher as you proceed through the second year.
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ok there is this guy .....and he is cute and everything...so i really wanna dance with him at the event next friday but.... my dad and brother are not allowing any danceing with boys ....plus my sis is going to so if she ses she will blab...what do i do? (link)
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"the event" really needs to be defined here. If it is a dance then it seems a little silly to let you go an not dance. If it is something else (few things where dancing will occur will go against the first line here) then it will probably be best to respect your father's wishes. It might not seem so but, he is looking out for your best interests.
Sometimes parents can be sarcastic as you advance in life and he might not have been serious about the no dancing rule, just to pull your leg. You know him much better than we. You should respect his wishes for now, especially while you are under his guardianship. If he was serious, just hang out and develop a good, strong background with this cute guy and you might find the wait worthwhile.
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Okay, so i REALLY like this guy. But I don't think he would like me back. I'm in 8th grade and i've never gone on a date or "gone out" with anyone before. If I asked out any guy in the school they'd probably rush me to the hospital or ask me if I was joking. I dunno, maybe i just have low self esteem. But the guy I like is pretty quiet and really smart. Please don't tell me to just go for it, cause if he said no, it would haunt me forever!! (i'm sort of a drama queen. shut up.) So I guess my question is: How can you tell if a guy likes you/would go out with you without actually asking him? (link)
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Here is an answer by way of life experience:
I had a crush on a girl in my class in the sixth grade. She was always ahead in the class, but quiet. She was beautiful, but not overly popular. We talked a few times, but I never acted on my crush to ask her out. We did not really see much of each other from seventh grade to first year in high school. We were in a class together again then. We had both changed a lot and I still liked the way she had grown. We had not really talked that much aside from acquaintance level small talk. I was kind of crushing on another girl that year but, there was always something about this one. We all left high school and went about our lives.
Fast-forward twenty years!
I had been online a while and had been a member of a site which keeps track of old school members for about five years. When her name popped up on the list, I could not resist sending her a friendly message. We started emailing each other and I found out she already had been married and had a child. She was divorcing and was presently going through that tough time. She did not let on to that fact right away, we had gotten to know each other again and in a much deeper way that ever! It was really great writing each other because you get to know someone from the inside first. I mean, we already knew how we used to look, so that is not fully like meeting an online stranger. However, we did not know how we looked at our new re-acquaintance. It did not seem to matter. We started getting really close to each other which advanced to exchanging pictures and some phone calls. We really hit it off! We finally saw each other and our first couple of meeting were great! We have really grown to know each other really well.
I think you should not worry about how quickly you get started with your attraction here. If you are compatible, you will be able to work it out over time. Get to be friends and acquaintances and see how it all works out from a strong foundation like that.
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When you work out and get sore muscles, what helps more, ice or heat? (link)
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I believe ice is for injuries to minimize the extent of brusing. Ice will more likely deaden the pain temporarily.
By heat, you should be working the area which is sore. If you are sore because you have not worked the muscles in a while, then you just need to work them more. You might find that after a few minutes of a minor workout your muscles will feel better.
Applying heat probably helps the blood flow to the complaining cells which offers them food and oxygen.
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I'm out of toothpaste. Is it socially acceptable to use ground up Mentos as a tooth-care substitute? (link)
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If you do use ground Mentos, add a spot of baking soda to actually do some work while you enjoy the minty flavor.
It is probably better to just brush with the brush and rinse with water than to add the sugary Mentos.
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Should I go out and buy really nice pans for cooking, or will the k-mart specials do it? (link)
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Do not shirk here unless you are roommating with someone or in a travelling field like the military! Take care of your nice pans and they will continually pay off in helping you make good non-stuck meals. That means, wash by hand and no metal utensils!
Note: k-mart specials might be nice pans. Research your pans first before being seduced by the blue-lights!
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