Member Since: September 23, 2019
Answers: 1
Last Update: September 23, 2019
Visitors: 246
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16 year old female...I began hooking up very young, pretty much as soon as Middle School started and didn't stop. If you'd like to pass judgment, you should understand I grew up in an unstable home and suffered through numerous mental health issues, and my beginning encounters were not completely consensual.
But I never told my mom a thing, and I wasn't honest about it until very soon when I got chlamydia which, for obvious reasons, forced me to be honest. Which I still wasn't-I tell people who ask I've hooked up with 3 and that's what I told the doctor, I spread it out and made one closest (I was honest about my most recent affair). People figure the rest out from rumors and people shit talking. I made it seem like a one time mistake rather than something that I see was inevitably going to happen...
The reason I named a few hookups is to make my lies more realistic, that's what I do with everything. Even therapists and shit. I just can't own up to it. My mom was all sad and shit about how she "missed my first kiss" ... when I was 13 I acted like I had my first kiss with a kid I was seeing. I reminded her of that, but I guess she didn't remember.
I've had a big wakeup call getting an STD and knowing this one is curable, a lot worse could've happened. I got every recent candidate to go get tested. I'm already known as the easy, slutty girl but maybe that will change. It's not that I'm a sex addict, I'm an attention addict.
I'm just asking, even for those of you who don't have problematic sex lives... should I come clean and honest? (link)
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It's good that you are lucid about your reasons for sex seeking. Sometimes we just need some sort of human companionship and we can't feel like we can't find that without someone being attracted to us. Or at least, that's my experience.
Will telling your mom help you? That's the real question. The truth is our parents don't always have to know everything about our lives, especially our sex lives. If you feel like it would help or that she could give you wisdom, go for it. If you feel like she would shame you or retaliate, don't.
But going back to my first point. The most important thing to do right now is build a stable sense of self and self esteem. And keep introspecting. I also feel like, if this is your form of escape, you need to figure out what you are escaping from and deal with that. Escape into fantasy is short term and you need long term solutions.
Cheers! Hope I could help
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