Member Since: April 26, 2011
Answers: 1
Last Update: April 26, 2011
Visitors: 349
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In my sixteen years, I have been in four relationships.
My first boyfriend was a sophomore when I was a freshman. He was very sweet and loving at first, and then took advantage of my stupidity and I ended up losing my virginity at the age of fourteen. I became scarred by the wounds he gave me, and I lost a lot of trust in myself and in relationships.
My second boyfriend was totally fake. I was his best friend and then we broke up after four months and he told me he never loved me and I was boring. I lost myself for a while, and in the months after I found who I was and healed.
My third boyfriend was the most amazing guy I have ever met. He and I had the greatest relationship. We had a full, open trust, long talks, and a great, faithful connection. I really felt in love with him. He broke it off with me in March because I was "depressing." He brought out the real me, and I was destroyed when we broke up. I still miss him to this day.
My last and most recent boyfriend didn't last very long. He and I talked for a while and then got together, and then because I was feeling doubtful and hurt, and he never made time for me, I broke up with him two days ago.
But now I am going into this stage again. I've been in it before. It's a stage I promised I'd never go back to. I've been depressed, hurt, angry, and lonely. I feel like I will never ever find anyone for me. Being a teenager sucks. I'm a very emotional person and I rely on others to make me happy. I'm in this constant longing, this yearning, for love, and I don't want my life to be constant heartbreak. I've had a low self-esteem lately, and I feel so lonely. I often think I will never ever like anyone again because I've been through all the people I could possibly like throughout my life. I never have felt anything recently for anyone, except for my best friend, but he rejected me....
I mean, is it normal to feel this way? Am I just going through what every teenage girl goes through?
I need a lot of advice on this.... thanks so much. (link)
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I have only had four boyfriends thus far as well, and I am 18, though I can tell you, its is COMPLETELY normal for you to feel like this. My third boyfriend was my first love as well, and though the relationship didn't last long, I was sent into depression, it felt like I would always feel heart-broken and angry. But the good news is this:
You will heal and you will find someone that will make you happy.
You are young, just remember that. Be patient. Try to think of some reasons why your best friend rejected you. It could be because he doesn't want to ruin what a good relationship you two already have, or that you are more like a sister to him. Think of it from his point of view. He did not reject you because he wanted to hurt you or he does not find you attractive, I'm sure you are a beautiful girl.
And maybe this is a sign for you to remain single for awhile. That may sound like a curse word to you, or it may not, but you need time to heal, and remaining single is one of the best ways to heal from a broken heart. It doesn't have to be for long, just as long as you need to get over maybe your third boyfriend or losing your virginity, if you aren't entirely over those two. And as the old saying goes, love will find you. There is a guy out there that will goes into the deepest cave or climb to the highest mountain to find you.
Also, do not, I repeat, DO NOT do anything stupid to try to heal. Drinking, drugs or harming yourself is NEVER an answer. Because then you just have an open wound, a headache and a broken heart. Be active, do things with your friends, focus on school, maybe hook into a church, if that is in your comfort zone. Trust me, if you fill your time wisely then you will not focus on your heart and the pain as much.
You have to kiss a hundred frogs before you find your prince.
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