I am an 18 year old, male, who is bored and wants to give advice- actually I think myself pretty good at it. I have a modest collection of tools and perspectives that I would absolutely love to share with anybody interested! Usually the advice I give will be a combination of things that I have been told work and my experience with them.
About myself:
I grew-up with my fair share of life, but I believe the core of our struggles as humans is inherently the same inside stuff. Music is a big part of my life and I really wish I could play, but alas, I can't! I have a girlfriend of two years and have learned a lot about myself and the world while living life with her. My favorite color is green and my favorite food is either crab or anything from an Indian restaurant. My favorite thing about life is.. I have no idea. Anyway, I think that about sums it up.
Location: California
Occupation: LVN Training
Age: 18
AIM: iamdeathbybacon
Member Since: November 7, 2009
Answers: 2
Last Update: November 7, 2009
Visitors: 1000
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I feel like i am an impulsive liar..... i sometimes lie for no reason at all. I lie when it would be easier to tell the truth and when if i tell the truth nothing bad is going to happen to me. it is just like i have to make everything different than it is. someone told me this was called "impulsive lieing" but i can't find anything on the internet about that? is it called something else?
am I the only one who does this? :( I don't want to but i don't know how to stop. (link)
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I can relate:
I used to exaggerate the holly hell out of my life to every person I met sophomore year of high school. Something just told me I wasn't good enough unless I exaggerated, but at the time I would have never guessed that was behind it. Also, once I started exaggerating so much, I felt I had to keep up the act. It came to a point where all I wanted to do was tell the truth but I was so scared of what people would think.
Here's my answer:
Sometimes it's hard to put this in perspective, but just start telling the truth despite the social consequences! You'll have a huge release once you feel it's all out there on the table- and then the worst of it will be over. Just keep away from the temptation from that point on, which will most likely be much easier once all the initial bulecrap is out of the way.
Also, remember you have just as much value as a person as anybody does. We are all equals on this earth. If your friends won't accept you for who you are then it is their loss, not yours. Just trust me, it really is there loss- no matter what.
Good luck as you trudge the road of happy destiny, sincerely,
--Schizotypic.
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I'm starting to get annoying to hang out with. I've become dramatic, emotional, and a blabber mouth. I can't keep my problems to myself, I'm so sensitive to everything people say even when they're joking, and I'm not as fun to be around anymore.
Any tips to loosen up and actually be fun to hang around again? (link)
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I can relate:
Based on your first sentence I would guess that you may have some self-esteem problems, this is perfectly okay. I have major self-esteem problems myself. For me, the root cause was the inherit feeling that I was worth in value less then everybody else.(1)
It also sounds like maybe you want some attention. I used to drop my entire life on anyone who would show me the light of day! It was because I associated bleating out my heart as intimacy or closeness. (2)
Answers:
(1&2)My philosophy is that of good-self esteem. Good self-esteem is the belief that we, as humans, are equal. Think of everybody on a horizontal line of equality rather then a vertical line of comparison! What I'm saying is that you have as much value as a person as anybody.
(1&2)It is my suggestion that you stop trying to please your friends. You are fine the way you are, and the more you can do to get this through your head the more readily these seemingly uncontrollable actions will cease. They just wouldn't be an urge if you believed yourself equal.
(1&2)One way I did this is by trying the things that scare me. Scared of having a lot of people around? Go be around a lot of people. Scared of not having your worth validated? Try not telling that guy sitting next to you your life story, instead just keep it to yourself- try giving yourself validation that your worth-while instead of trying to get it from things you cannot control.
My final stance: It is ridiculous to try and validate your worth with anything that you cannot control, and the only thing you can control is yourself. You definitely cannot control what your friends think of you.
Hope I helped,
sincerely Schizotypic.
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