I have been rich, I have been poor, I have been elated, lost, I have succeeded and failed. And through that, I choose happiness. I am convinced that we have more choices and control than we think we have -- even when life feels out of control. Anne Frank summarizes it aptly with her last written words, "Despite everything, I believe people are really good at heart."
For most of my life, I have been the one people call when they have problems. My personal goal is to be a haven, a person who people can let their guard down with, the world is full of enough people with expectations. I believe in being human.
I consider it an honor when someone shares a problem or issue and I do not take that responsiblity lightly. And it is also a joy.
I am a published writer, and am using this site as my trial run at being an advice columnist. My friends who are 20 and 30 years older often describe me as wise and encourage their friends to talk with me as well. I have seen much of the world as a communcations consultant and have been told most of my life that I have this "gift."
I hope that my words bring hope to you and guide your soul in the direction of your heart.
Gender: Female
Location: I have traveled much
Occupation: Consultant
Member Since: October 15, 2006
Answers: 4
Last Update: October 16, 2006
Visitors: 1603
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What does this quote mean?
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away."
Thanks so much! (link)
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This compares something concrete and quantifiable like "number of moments" to something non-quantifiable -- the quality of these moments.
Life is often measured by accomplishments, but living life for these breaths or tangibles is futile, and lacks reward. At any moment, all plans can be snatched away ... and at that moment all that is left, and all that is important are moments. So this means we should live for the moments, and make them of the highest quality -- the kind that take your breath away.
And you can only squeeze so many breaths into a lifetime. Some people get more of those breaths, some less. And often times, circumstances beyond our control decide the number of breaths. All the more reason to make every breath count.
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I'm going camping next weekend, and my brothers best friend is coming home from college for a visit as well. Well i've always had quite a crush on him, and I've missed him a lot over the time he's been at college, and i'm just wondering... should I tell him how I feel? I'm pretty sure he knows I like him, and everybody in my family thinks he likes me, but I don't know. I'm 14 by the way, and he's 18. I don't want to hear about the age difference thing, just about if I should tell him how I feel, and how. (link)
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I'm with younggrandma on this one -- I had lots of crushes on older guys. They were more mature, and even looking back so was I compared to my peers. And man! -- I thought my heart was going to break if I could not be with them. In my teens I had at least three crushes on olde guys.
One guy lived who lived right next door, and was really cute and had a nice car and pretty girlfriends going in and out all the time. And I just dreamed of the day that he would notice me, well ... it took him about two years and he finally did! I was 16 then, he about 20, and it was like a dream come true -- Until ... he tried to makeout with me the first time we really talked, and even after all that dreaming, I realized I was not ready and he did love me, or even really know me -- he was just going to take advantage of my "crush." I did not let him, I left, and that ended the crush.
I recommend waiting too -- if he does respond in the way you dream, it will almost definitely lead to sex. It is the physical aspect of way we are made. For one, if that happens he could land in jail and for two, when in comes to serious or long-term dating, right now he's probably going to date someone in his own peer group (in college). Either way, you'll be sitting there with your heart in your hands, because you gave a part of you that you can never take back.
Hang on a few years and "wow" him when you are both adults, it's not as far away as you think. If the feeling is still there, and he bites, you will have some wonderful stories to tell of your secret crushes. Keep a diary, it will help you think it through.
Good Luck!
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I'm a virgin and I want to stay a virgin until marriage. Don't get my wrong; this question is not about fighting perr pressure to change my mind. Actually, I'm worried about my friends. There are only 4 girls in my church youth group including me. The other three have all lost their virginity. (My youth group age range is 11-15 btw) One of them is a slut, mostly because she's gulliable and likes guys WAY TOO MUCH. Another one of them, my cousin, lost her virginity to a player, and now has fallen for another player, who is a guy in my youth group! He's the brother of the slut, and he's a manwhore, too. She's determined to make him fall in love with her, even if it means using her body to tempt him. She made a video for her of herself acting sexy and talking dirty. Luckily she hasn't given it to him yet. Now, outside my youth group... One of my long-time crushes (age 14) who also goes to church and was our 8th grade valedictorian... he's a teen father. He got his girlfriend pregnant. And she's only 14, too. So, I'm really scared. I don't want my friends to get STDs or get pregnant. I want them to have morals. Plus, if they are acting like this... is there anyone left out there besides me whose still decent? These people are Christians, you'd think they'd have some sense! But they don't! I'm already worried that I'm never going to be able to find a husband that hasn't been with another girl... Yet I'm so powerless because if I boss around my friends, they won't be my friends anymore. HELP! & Sorry this is so long! (link)
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I am sorry you are stressed out about this, I was in a similar situation when I was younger, I was the "good-girl" so-to-speak, and it can be a little confusing because of what is going on outside the church is the complete opposite of what is being taught inside the church.
Fortunately, you do see that their behavior is dangerous and it is good that you see it! What they are doing is DEFINITELY more dangerous than fun, but I think the real reason you are writing is that you feel "different" -- and it is really, really hard to be different, but you are doing great.
I think deep down, because you are just human, a part of you wants to be like them, but you can't and won't because you are wise of the consequences. Stick to that, and find friends with similar values.
And for goodness sake, don't worry about a husband now. When it's time, you are going to be quite the catch -- for waiting :)
Gypsi Laine
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I really want to be a singer. It's my dream. But I need work and I know that, it's just I dont know where to turn for help! I feel completely lost! I'm torn between going to college and not going to college...I'm torn between doing American Idol next season or not..should I talk to my school couselor? I dont know what to do!! (link)
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Always, always follow your dream. But remember, following your dream does not necessarily mean giving everything else up. Even people in Hollywood go to college, and there opportunites there to sing while in college as well -- sometimes more. Certain universities are centered around music and the off-campus scene provides plenty of opportunites to sing in; clubs, etc.
Try out for American Idol. Assume you will make it, don't feel nervous or act shy. Act like you will make it from the moment you stand in line. Remember, there is always room for blubbering later and you need to think positive until your very last breath. You can approach a lot of things in life this way and they generally turn out better than if you hold your insecurities in your pocket.
Do go to college, it is your insurance in life. This next part is not discourage you, because I perform too, but the chances that a person will "make it" in music, statistically, are less than winning the lottery. That is nothing personal, it's just numbers. But if you have talent, go for it, and people do make it in music.
Just stick with the back-up plan (college). If nothing else, you will know you tried and not be some bitter old woman when you grow up, always wondering, "What if I did ... " do this or that.
And most of all, sing because you love it -- not for glory, not for the wealth. Focus on the people you are singing to, not yourself. When you exude positive energy, something will come back to you, it might not be in the form of a music contract, but something will. The world loves enthusiasm and energy.
Good luck and have fun!
Gypsi Laine
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