about

===IN THE THIRD PERSON:===
Meet Kathryn: burlesquer, model, actor, ukulele-er, fantastic cook, and font of wise words and amusing anecdotes. She loves to listen to you and, if she can, help you with your troubles, or, if she can't help, direct you to someone who can. And that's why you're here, no? ~grins~

Kathryn is a person of wide and varied experience. Her only routine is to try something new every day. She has met many people in her travels from many different backgrounds, countries, and expertises. "Knowledge junkie" is something Kat frequently calls herself.

===THINGS I FEEL QUALIFIED TO GIVE ADVICE ABOUT:===
***romantic relationships
***general and nutritional health (I disclaim: I am not a doctor, nor a certified nutritionist yet...I merely have read a lot, experienced a lot in my own life, have personally heard testimonials on a variety of health issues and healthy lifestyle practises, and am a yoga instructor and Ayurvedic health consultant)
***sexual health
***technology (computers specifically, but other techie things like me too ^_^)
***philosophy, theology, and psychology
***social issues
***crafty artsy thingies (excuse the technical jargon)

===POSSIBLE POLITICAL/IDEALOGICAL CONFLICTS WITH YOUR OWN VIEWS:===
*I was raised as a Catholic (the Roman kind), I went to Catholic parochial grade school, I attended a Catholic high school (a Sacred Heart school), and now I attend a Catholic Jesuit university. Although I don't call myself Catholic or Christian, I respect and acknowledge the good things I was raised with.
*I am not prejudiced against any ethnic, socioeconomic, or cultural background.
*I am not prejudiced against any religion or spiritual path, including a lack of one (atheism, don't-give-a-damn-ism).
*I am not prejudiced against any sexual orientation or gender identity. I myself am romantically and sexually queer, physically female, mentally gender-f***ed. If you ever want to talk about sexual orientation and/or gender identity, don't hesitate to contact me! I am working toward a sexology degree, and these things interest me immensely!
*I don't care for politics very much, but I respect the people who are wise with their words and respectful to others.

===SOME QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE FOR ME (BEFORE YOU ACTUALLY ASK YOUR QUESTION):===
"You're only 24! You don't know anything about the world. How could you possibly give me advice on anything?" Perhaps I am fairly young to be giving advice to people. But I do know this: everyone who has ever come to me looking for counsel has always told me, either during or right after our "sessions", that I am not overly critical, that I am honest and fair, that I am sensitive and understanding, that I am open-minded and tolerant, that they can count on me to give a good outside objective perspective, and (something I think is most important in being an advisor) that I am a good listener.

"What types of things do you give advice on?" Well, I can give you advice on almost anything, really. If I personal experience with what you're asking about, I'll patch it through. If I don't, I'll put in my two cents and let you know where you can get more firsthand knowledge.

"Why do you write sooooo muuuuuch?"
I'm a writer, I blabber sometimes, heh. I do take a lot of care in my writing though, I want to give you a well-thought-out answer. But the other reason I write so much is because I don't want to give you a one-sentence reply, unless it's to a very black-and0white question like "What time does 'House' air on Tuesday in Cincinnati?"

===IN CLOSING:===
You got questions? Lemme at 'em!

I wish you all lives filled with tasty food, goofball antics, and people you love to share them with you.

~*Kathryn*~

advice

Well a couple of days ago i had sex with my boyfriend and now when i pee it stings and i have a little blood come out thats pink not that its like my period what do you think it means?

first of all, there's probably no need to worry too much right now, you're still ok. ^_^

depending on whether or not you and your boyfriend have had sex before, that stong and little bit of blood could be due to your hymen breaking (there's a picture that might take you aback, but... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hymen. there is some good information and links too). if you guys have, or even haven't before, then it could be a little bit of mild damage to nearby tissue, but as long as you both are free of STDs and other infections, then it should heal up fairly soon.

it's also possible that, maybe due to the way you two were positioned, he could've literally rubbed you the wrong way. :P so, you may have a slight urinary tract infection, which is not very serious and usually goes away within a few days.

if the stinging persists, i would definitely advise you to go see your doctor or maybe your gyno if you have one.

hope this helped. good luck!

~*kitty*~

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what is the difference between regular sex and dry sex?

while i think there is no such thing as "regular sex", i'll leave that aside for the moment... ^_^

actually, no i won't, because it has to do with what i'm going to say next. "sex" is too broad a term, especially when talking to me. :P if you're referring to the sexual intercourse kind of sex, then i suppose you could classify that as "regular sex", although i think it's up to the individuals involved whether or not to have pieces of clothing on during s.i. sex. "dry sex" isn't usually used to describe s.i.; more often it's used to describe (yar, beware, a wee bit of graphic language be ahead -_-;) "dry humping", which basically is going through the motions of s.i. (thrusting, grinding, rubbing, etc.) without actual penetration.

well, that was certainly educational, in a roundabout not-quite-disgusting sort of way... ^_^ hope you enjoyed it, hope i made ya laugh.

until any further questions on sexual jargon, i bid you adieu.

~*kitty*~

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ok i feel like a total nerd asking this since im 16... but what do people mean by "blow job" and "giving head"? my friends and stuff always talk about it but people at my old school never did so i never really got clued in on all these slang terms and i dont wanna ask my friends and seem like an idiot.. lol.

heh, i can understand your embarrassment of not knowing all the hip sexual slang, because i lived through that. now i probably know more than most college guys. :P

(disclaimer: if graphic sexual language offends, shocks, or disgusts you, either don't read on, or get over it and just read. ~_^)

"blow-job", "b.j.", "giving head", "going down on", "dome", etc. all mean the same thing really; they're slang for the sexual act of fellatio. those above slang terms are rather cryptic. one of the most obvious slang phrases for fellatio is (don't hit me for graphic language ^_^;) "sucking dick".

basically, it's oral sex. or if you want me to be more specific, it's when a girl (or even a guy, i guess) sucks on/licks/breathes on/etc. the shaft of a guy's penis and sometimes the testicles. it's not one specific thing. other things are often incorporated with it, like hand-jobs (i'll just hope you know that one ^_^), kissing/licking/nibbling inner thighs, or in a girl/guy couple both people perform oral sex on the other at the same time (this position is sometimes called "69", just look at those numbers and figure it out if you don't know the term ~_^).

if it's your guy buddies that are always talking about it, that's probably because with many guys, getting a girl to give you a blow-job gives you major automatic points in popularity with other guys and somehow earns their respect. i wouldn't know why they think that. it might be because the stereotypical average girl doesn't like giving head because it's gross, demeaning, etc., and it sometimes affects the female crowd and makes them think that only real sluts would give a guy a blow-job. neither of these things are really true. i do know that some girls just hate the thought of their mouth being anywhere near a guy's crotch (understandable, as some guy's don't bathe well before having that done to them... ^_^;), unless they really really like/love them in which case they might consider doing it. and not all girls who perform fellatio are sluts; many do it for practice, because they really care about their partner, or even because they've never done it before and want to explore something new.

remember: you don't need to feel like a nerd or an idiot if you don't know what a word means. unless it's something like demagogue, eschew, quadrennial, antediluvian, leviathan, or peripatetic. that's when you should be worried. ^_^ (all right, that was supposed to be a joke. did ya laugh? feel any better??)

hope this helped. good luck!

~*kitty*~

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hey!can a girl with my problem answer this and a guy who actually knows what he's talking about?? i'm 14 and am a DD, i have a huge ass, and just so i can get the best advice- i happen to think i'm really pretty! (so not conceited) but i feel like guys only like me for that and i don't do anything with guys so i don't have a rep or anything but i'm completely embarresed about my boobs and i hate wearing....shirts in getneral. even through my sweatshirts you can see them!!! don't tell me to be happy with what i've got because its notpossible. i've tried every kind of bra, nothing makes me look smaller than a D or a C. what can i do?!?!?!?! THEIR HUUUUGEEEEE!!!!!! can a girl with my problem answer this and a guy who actually knows what he's talking about??

well unless you're gonna get reduction surgery (and i don't advise this), you should learn to live with your natural bustiness.

to be fair to the guys, big boobs and a big ass/hips are attractive to them instinctively because that means you're good for child bearin'! ^_^ also, to cite a rather crude though mildly amusing phrase, with fleshy thighs and ass, there's "more cushion for the pushin'" when having sex. :P these words come straight from the mouths of my guy friends and boyfriend (i've got a lot of guy friends that treat me like a guy friend--who just happens to be a girl--, so they tell me a lot of good stuff that i probably wouldn't know otherwise ^_^).

clothing-wise, reducing bras that fully cover most of your breasts are probably the way to go. for shirts, don't wear anything too thin or tight or low-cut, and cotton is probably better than stretchy stuff; for shirt styles, button-up, medium to big pin stripes, long-sleeved, moderate square necklines. for pants, stay away from ones that are really tight around the waist because you don't want your hips sticking out over the waistband (don't think i'm saying you're big or anything, i just hate when even stick-like girls wear jeans so tight they look like they have rolls of fat spilling over the sides), try and find pants that aren't low-rise and don't have sides that are sewn streamlined (completely straight).

i'm not sayin' you have to dress like a nun, just try and keep your dress code slightly more modest than what a&f and american eagle would have you keep it (sorry, small a&f/americaneagle bashing moment ^_^). if wearing sweatshirts doesn't seem to work, you could try loose long sweaters or sweatercoats, or knit ponchos (not the wimpy ones that are made with less string than on a spool of thread), or shawls (i have a bunch of old knit "granny" ones that i adore ^_^).

i know that this worked for me (although it was my natural habit to do so anyway...), it was easy for me because i actually like things like "kill bill" and video games and warhammer and talking about the most efficient way to kill someone with a pen (erm, yeah, don't ask...^_^), and i'm more laid back and i much more low-maintenance than most girls. if you think the guys are still concentrating more on the more prominent parts of you rather than on what you're talking about, talk about them (sports they play, video games they like). this isn't for all girls, but try and be like "one of the guys", hang out with them as if you possess the y chromosome. ^_^

hope this helped. good luck!

~*kitty*~

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i think i may be a lesbian or bi! i have a boy friend whom i love but when i read things about girls and boys having sex it just grosses me out. but when i read about two girls i get sooo horny! i love my boyfriend but i just am really sexually attracted to girls.... i can't be... can I?

ok, now this is something that i have personal experience with. ^_^ i have a boyfriend whom i've dating for a year and 4 months, and i love him very very much (really, i do, we both disgust me sometimes ^_^), although i do consider myself bisexual. i am attracted to 2 or 3 girls right now, and that in no way conflicts with the love and attraction i feel for my bf.

it's actually pretty normal and more common for women to more aroused by reading about or seeing two girls having sex than when reading about or seeing a straight couple have sex. for me personally, it just depends on my mood. ^_^ i think it has something to do with girls being more comfortable with bodies and parts that they themselves are familiar with. also, in my personal opinion, two girls making out can be a lot more sensual and fun to watch than a guy and girl.

also, have you said anything to your boyfriend? my guess is that he wouldn't be too put out about you maybe being bi (and when i say "wouldn't be too put out" i mean he'll probably be freaking out and bragging to all his friends ^_^). my boyfriend knows i'm bi, and he's even given me permission to play around a little with girls (as long as i give him some info, still love him best, and have a story or two for him every now and again ^_^).

just stay open-minded about it; don't knock it till you try it, i always say. and be sure to be conscious and sensitive to how your boyfriend feels about it, and be sure to stay honest with him. finally, don't try and overanalyse your possible bi-ness (pardon my not-so-technical jargon :P ), because whether you are or you aren't, don't let completely define who you are and what you do, because there's a whole lot more to you than who you make out with. ^_^

hope this helped and maybe made you think. good luck, luv!

~*kitty*~

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