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i'll give you some background information .. ok so my bestfriend of the opposite sex lives in massachusetts and i live in newyork. we're both 16. we met three years ago at our grandparent's retirement development in florida while we were both there visiting. we obviousily became really good friends. neither of our grandparents live in florida anymore as of last year. last summer we really wanted to see eachother so we both convinced out parents to let me go to massachusetts to see him .. and i did and we had an amazing time. so i went back this past april for a week and you can totally say we became more than friends in april. it was the first time we had hooked up.

it doesnt seem that he has any sort of interest in coming here to newyork to visit me which i really dont mind because i'd rather go there anyway because i became really close with his family too. and i was thinking about going back again this summer. and his confirmation is the 27th. and with the job i have if i plan on going anywhere i need to let my boss know so she can make other arrangements without being stressed out. so i was thinking since that is a set day that i would leave to go to massachusetts on the 26th. and then i had another brilliant idea of not telling him im coming and surprise him. i was text messaging his mom on saturday and asked her if i could come back and visit within the next month and she told me of course i could whenever and however long. and i told her if we could keep it a secret from john and she said of course. i had told his bestfriend that i was gonna try to make plans to come for john's confirmation. me and eric got into a fight so to get back at me i guess, eric told john that i was planning on coming and surprising him and that i was using going to california as a coverup. which was the plan. and in my AIM profile i had "july 26th-august 3rd california" in my profile. so john IMed me and ill paste the convo ..

john: since when are you goin to cali?
me: uhm the other day
me: im going to see my uncle.
john: mhm...........questionable
me: what do you mean questionable?

john: eric told me that is a cover up bc your comign here for my confirmation on the 27th
me: erics a dick
john: is that true?

me: it was
me: but then i knew he told you
me: and thats the week i can get off of work
me: and my uncle had asked me if i did want to go to california
me: so i decided to gooooo cos ive only been there once and it was for his wedding
john: u might as well go to cali bc imhave work everyday that week besides that
me: ok
john: sorry
me: w/e


so after that conversation i was very questionable able still wanting to go to massachusetts. cos i dont know if john's basically telling me that he doesnt want to see me and doesnt want me to come. i was gonna call john's mom this week anyway to set everything up for me going. and i was gonna ask her what she thought about me coming if she thought it was ok or not the best time. because when im there i dont just sit around with john the whole time, i spend time with his mom and brothers and his grandparents also. when i was there in april he had baseball practice for three hours everyday and i was fine while he was gone. so i dontknow i'm still gonna ask john's mom but i do need some other advice .. soo this is so long! thanks in advanced:)

i think if you want to see him, that you should go up and visit him because obviously you like his family, too.
i think honestly that his little "i have to work" thing is a cover up because he didn't say that in the first place;;
and that little friend eric is a diiiick.

so call his mother and ask her what's going on, because she seems to really want to see you.

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My best friend who i used to like lies to me and blows me off half the time. Today during school i asked her to hang out and she told me she had to clean her house. Later on i went to the carnival in town and i see her there. Everytime i look in her direction she hides from me, i look over and she hides behind her friendsor turns around. Why does she do this?

it depends, maybe if you did something wrong and she is afraid to talk to you about it, or maybe she just wants to grow apart from you..

mention the situation to her and how it hurts you, and then give her some space and hang out with other friends.
if she wants your friendship she will be mature and talk to you about whatever is bothering her.

good luck.

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how do i become better friends with my casual friends. i just transfered to a private school in the beginning of the 2nd quarter and i have made some really good friends and a few good friends and some casual friends but i want to improve the friendships (the casual and good ones)to something closer. thanks so much! :)

well, if you want to become good friends with acquaintances, then start making plans with them, like outside of school, don't be just school friends, but anyways, don't lose your already good friends, you are going to have to be able to keep a balance.

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