I will keep this brief. I am an individual who has lived a lot of life. I would like to help everyone who needs assistance. Just remember, you may not get the answer you want; however, I will provide you with the answer I think you need.
Gender: Male
Location: Albuquerque, NM and I now reside in Los Angeles, CA
Occupation: Executive Analyst in Telecommunications and Film enthusiast.
Age: 27
Member Since: October 18, 2012
Answers: 5
Last Update: October 21, 2012
Visitors: 2552
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A lot has happened to me this past 2 years, and about 4 months ago I occasionally started cutting and making myself throw up. the throwing up has stopped, but the cutting hasnt. Things have been really hard for me :'( I hate being like this. I'm always sad and depressed and the instant I get upset all i think about is a razor blad slicing my arm. I cant help it.. It's almost as if I'm addicted to the pain. I want to get better, but I feel like I can't. What should I do? I have massive anxiety too. Any ideas as to what's wrong with me? :( (link)
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Dear Pain,
Lets start by saying that everyone has problems, right? Now lets follow that up and agree with saying that everyone's personal circumstance makes their situation unique. Everyone in the world has a different finger print, even twins.
You seems to grasp the severity of cutting and it is a good thing that you are asking for help. I want to first explain that no-one here is able to give you the professional service of medically explaining what is going on.
When I was younger, I had a friend who use to cut herself and it got worse as time went by. One time she explained to me that she hasn't had a job for 4 months and is still seeking employment. After the call abruptly ending I went to her house to see that she cut too deep, and as a result I ended up taking her to the hospital. That was a wake up call for everyone, including herself.
She explained that the feeling she experienced far outweigh the feelings of her depression. The pain she felt after she cut herself would last for days and avert her thoughts.
As someone who is invested the in happiness of those around me, I employee you to seek what really makes you happy. I understand that finding something that you really enjoy can be challenging and may feel as though it isn't enough, but find it, find a passion. Become engulfed in this passion and let that steer you to a more healthy future.
I know it sounds like hogwash. And maybe a bit far fetched by give yourself something that you can look forward to, something that is for you and you alone.
I hope this helps stir a few ideas.
-CLE247
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