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My name is Elizabeth! I am new to the site, but not new to getting advice! I would love to help you with any problems. I am very knowledgeable about things such as: dating and relationships; nutrition and fitness; make-up, hair, and fashion; sex and staying pure; spirituality and religion; personal body questions; alcohol and drugs; and much more.
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My boyfriend and me have been dating for over 10 months now and everything has been great. Granted, there has been our ups and downs, as all good relationships do, but recently it seems as though he's been ignoring me. He won't answer my texts or calls. When we do talk its because I call him for the third time. I ask if I did something to upset him or if something is wrong and he says no and that everything is ok. He's been acting strange; when we talk he doesn't say much and it seems he doesn't want to talk to me anymore. I'm very lost in what's going on with him. Please I need some serious advice (a guys opinion would be very helpful as well). Please answer soon. Thank you. We love each other and I want to make it work. I am 16 and he is 17. I know we are young and some people think people our age can't be in love but in this case we very much do, so please if you answer this let it be about our problem not based on just our age. Thank you
I understand, because I have been there. Although I do not know whether or not you two are actually "in love", I know that it is possible to be in love at 16.
I don't know y'alls relationship or what goes on, but from what you have told me, I think it could be one (or more) of these choices:
1) He could be getting tired of the relationship. This isn't uncommon, sadly, this happens even in marriages. And it doesn't mean that you are doing something wrong. I have felt this way many times (leading to break-ups). After 10 months, especially being a teenage boy, he may just want to be single. (Which is okay, you're young and being single is fun too.) He could be ignoring you because he is just tired of it. If this is the case, I think breaking up would be the ideal solution. Or, y'all could take a "break". Give each other some space for a while and then see how he feels about the relationship.
2) I hate to ask, but have you ever heard the term "Honeymoon Stage"? This is talking about the first 6-12 months of a relationship where the couple is so in love and maybe hasn't been faced with actual difficulties because the relationship is still so new. (Like how an actual honeymoon is wonderful and stress-free.) It has been proven that in most relationships (regardless of age) the first year is usually kinda a "puppy love", and if the relationship can last longer (through the honeymoon stage), then it is real and can truly last.
Y'all could be coming out of this stage. If you think this could be the case, try to work it out. Maybe still giving him some space is the answer. Don't drive him crazy with calls and text messages. But do some him that you care and you want to be with him.
3)He could feel smothered, like you are too "all-consuming". This is the case with many break-ups. Guys are like hunters. (Now that many sound like a weird comparison, but it's true!) Guys like to chase the girl. They like it when you are hard to get, even in a committed relationship. (Most guys will not admit this, but when I've talked to guys who have truly thought about they will tell me "It is frustrating, but I like a challenge.") Maybe he just needs you to let him chase you. This may be hard, and if it is... join the club! But don't text him, face book him, call him, or ask him why he is acting how he is. Let him pursue you. Be busy - without him. When he does text you first, take a while to respond (I'm thinking like 30 minutes!) When he calls, don't answer; then, you can call him back later. Don't wait around by the phone waiting for him to contact you! Go out with some friends and enjoy yourself!
Pray about it! Ask God to show you what you need to do; he is so there for you, much more than anyone else could possibly be, and he can help. I hope it all works out, and I hope to hear back form you soon. Please, do me a favor and don't let him control your joy and emotions. You are young! I'm 17, and I know where you're at. Boys seem so much more important than they are sometimes (actually all the time!). But God has a plan for you and for this relationship you are in right now. And you don't know who it is yet, no one does, but he already has your future husband picked out for you. He is somewhere being prepared for you; just as you are being prepared by God for him. Don't let the little things get you down. And just know, that no matter what happens it will all work out as it is suppose to. :)
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