Hello, I genuinely like helping others by giving advice out to others.
My intrests are in psychology/mental health but I do like giving out advice on other areas like family/friendship/womens health and just general life advice. Feel free to message me!
E-mail: tigz_285@yahoo.co.uk
Gender: Female
Location: UK
Member Since: March 27, 2012
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Last Update: October 25, 2021
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My sister is a lot older than I am and was kicked out when I was a toddler for being gay. I'm 15 now and she's 29, and the family hasn't had any contact with her since then. I found her on IG a while back and have been keeping up with her. I don't follow her or anything, just look at what she posts so it's not like she knows I found her. I obviously don't remember her, I've just seen pics of her and have heard some stories about her from cousins. I feel like our parents would be mad if I reached out, but she seems cool and I would love to talk to her. I don't care that she's a lesbian and I think what our parents did was really wrong. I'm just nervous at how she's going to react, I know that she has to remember me, and I know that I didn't do anything but what if she hates me lol. Should I send her a message and hope for the best or just mind my own business? (link)
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I doubt she will hate you because like you said, you have done nothing wrong and you were a toddler when she was kicked out the house. That being said, it is good to be prepared for all outcomes. You can control how you reach out to her and your desire to reconnect with her, however you can not control whether it is well received. It is unlikely that she will react badly but I think it is wise to be prepared, say if she is angry or maybe hold resentment because of your parents. Think about how you will respond in these situations and think about maybe having a support system in place in case things do not go well. I am not saying it will not go well, but just in case it does not go as well as you hoped for.
I think sending a message over social media might be a good start as it puts less pressure on her to respond straight away. Maybe you could also start following her and liking some of posts and see how she responds. You might want to meet up and talk things through and clear the air about what happened in the past. She might not know your intention on getting in contact or where you stand on her being a lesbian and if you agree with your parents for kicking her out. So make it clear that you have no problem about her sexual orientation and that you accept her for who she is.
If you want to get in contact with her and build a relationship with her then I don’t see why not. Your parents might be angry and that is something you might need to deal with but it is your decision at the end of the day.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you! That really helped a lot and things are better for me now.
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