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Member Since: October 24, 2013
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I'm thirteen and female. I have felt rather confused about who I am lately.
I'm going to start with the fact that I just can't stand to look like a girl. When I look in the mirror, I dislike what I see. It's almost like I'm looking at a stranger. I mean, what I see on the outside doesn't really match who I am on the inside.
I want to cut my hair short, but my parents would never let me, so a lot of times I have to hide my hair with the hood of my sweater. And I wear clothes from the guys' section because it makes me feel more like my true self.
If I am going to a formal event and my mom makes me wear a dress, it feels extremely wrong, and I get upset about it.
When I see guys, I sometimes get jealous that I'm not one of them. And if someone refers to me as a "girl" or a "lady," I get frustrated about it and feel depressed. I get upset that they think they know who I really am, and I wish I could be referred to as a guy instead.
And once someone thought I was a guy and not a girl, and it made me really happy.
What is making me feel like this? I'm just so confused. But then I'm only thirteen, and I guess I'm going to change a lot before I'm an adult. But this is bothering me so much and making me feel depressed, and I can't stop thinking about it.
If you have any advice, I would really appreciate it. And please don't judge me. I'm already insecure enough. . . . (link)
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What you seem to be dealing with is how you see yourself, boy or girl. I can think of two main reasons of why you're feeling this way. 1) you are growing up, and espsecially around your age people may begin to wonder about their identity as a women or man, gay or straight, and really just who they are as a person. This is just growing and maturing, don't feel depressed! As you mature you'll learn more about yourself and others, to help you figure out these questions you currently have. It may sound like total bull, but you have years ahead of you to experience life and who you are as an individual just making their way through the world like billions of other people. 2) quite possibly, you may be lesbian or wish to be transgender. If you don't know what that means, being a lesbian (or gay) is falling in love with the same gender. Transgender means you feel as if you are a boy trapped in a girls body, or vis versa, and want surgery to turn you physically into a boy or girl. If this is the case you may have a long journey ahead of you, because many disagree with being gay or transgender, quite possibly even your own parents. BUT, this in NO WAY means you shouldn't discuss this with them. If you truly feel as if you're a boy trapped in a girls body, or maybe feel at all attracted to girls, tell them! Your parents are their for you and if you feel confused and deppressed about this, they will be the first to help. Please, if you would like to discuss more about this with me, simply write in my coloum and I'll reply back ASAP. All These things are completely natural. Remember, talk to your parents pronto about it, they should understand. Good luck and apologies for the ultra long response!
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Rating: 5
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Thank you! This actually helped me a lot. :)
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