Member Since: August 7, 2012
Answers: 1038
Last Update: August 2, 2021
Visitors: 33693
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Hi!
18/f/UK
So naturally when I meet new people I am shy-not an introvert, just shy.
I worry whether they like me, and automatically think people don't.
Well I'm going to Uni soon, and I am freaking out!
I know no one knows each other, but it takes me a while to get 'with the crowd'.
I want to go out, and party etc...but I'm scared I'll make the wrong impression on the first few days and that I'll be left out and stuff.
How can I involve myself more and make a real good impression?
Thanks~ from a shy girl who wants to change! (link)
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Hi there. It's a fact that you're about to enter an environment which is and will be unlike anything you've encountered before. And unlike any you'll come across again. It's not home, and it's not your own place. It's not school and it's not work. You'll be away from 'your crowd' and pitched into a new one. I know that 'shy' can come across and stand-offish and aloof and that can set up barriers which are a million miles from what you want to do. Try to overcome the 'people don't like me' mindset, it's too negative. Meet your new acquaintances with a big smile, open and honest looks. We all like being liked...get your charm-offensive in first! Confront your fears head-on. 'It's a bit scary now I'm actually here...I wonder what the rest will be like?' is a great ice-breaker. You'll all want to party, to de-stress after lectures. Party might not mean full make-up and clubbing...might mean getting together in your/someone's room and chatting sometimes. Normally, everyone 'shakes down' together before long. They will not, I promise you, all morph instantly into one social group...with you lonely and on the outside! Be yourself. Most people find they form bonds and ties with university friends which are very special and lasting, it's a natural consequence of rubbing together, living in each others pockets, sharing laughs and fears. You simply cannot keep up an act or project and image for 3 or more years, you see each other 'warts and all' as it were. And during holidays your 'old set' might well remark that you 'seem different'...and it will change you. But in a good way. You've already sussed a major point...no one knows each other. You're not trying to get in with an existing clique or gang. Be open, honest...yourself. Put out good, friendly vibes straight away. Reserve, taking your time to weigh-up new acquaintances is a good thing in everyday adult life. But I think you can let down your guard a little here. It can and should be a very special period of your life, and as I've said, unlike any other. You'll be fine I reckon. Best wishes...and have FUN!!
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Rating: 5
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Thanks you have no idea how much this has helped me! I'll print screen your advice for future, take care!
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