Member Since: July 2, 2012
Answers: 5
Last Update: August 19, 2012
Visitors: 1129
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Hi, I'm an 18 year-old female, fresh out of high school, and I've never dated anyone. Ever. Never had a boyfriend, never been kissed, never been on a date even. I've been asked to a couple dances, but that's about the extent of it. And that's sort of on purpose. See, I never wanted to date anyone, firstly because most of the guys at the schools I have gone to have been complete jerks, but mostly because I'm very serious about relationships. Most middle school relationships last about a month max. Plus at the time I wanted to focus on having fun with school and friends, and sports. High school relationships have a bit more potential than middle school ones of course, but they're so drama-filled, time consuming, and just plain stressful. Plus, there's a slim chance they'll actually succeed after high school. So, I made the decision not to date anyone until college, and that was probably one of the smartest decisions I've ever made. I could just focus on growing up, focus on MY issues, and I was free to do what I wanted, when I wanted with my friends (with my parents' permission, of course, haha).
Now that I'll be in college, I'm allowing myself to date. But... I'm EXTREMELY inexperienced. So I know basically nothing about relationships. The main problem is, I'm a Christian, so I really want to save myself, my virginity, until marriage. It's just... something that I've had a long time to ponder and pray about, and it just feels like something God wants me to do. And it's something I want too, for me and my future husband. But nowadays, ESPECIALLY nowadays, that's not an easy task. We're bombarded with sex on TV, in movies and media, it's just everywhere! Even a lot of my own friends are no longer virgins. And the majority of sex is featured with non-married couples. I know it's okay to go without sex in high school, (although it's becoming increasingly uncommon), but is it the same with adult relationships? I mean, premarital sex has just become a common thing.
Basically, I just want to know if I'll be able to go out into the relationship world and not be a laughing stock who'll end up dying alone (after all, that is a huge fear of mine). >>; I mean, sex seems to be this regular activity for couples, and I don't want to be laughed at by a boyfriend when he goes to take off my pants and I tell him no. I'm prepared for that, but I want to know if it's possible nowadays to even have a successful relationship without sex. Is it possible? Do couples HAVE to have sex? Thank you for your time. :] (link)
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Hi :) don't worry about it, you don't have to have sex when you don't want it yet, or in your case before marriage. I'm almost 18 myself and have a bf for 8 months but we haven't done it either (i just finished high school) so its not weird when you are different from other girls. If its the right guy he will accept it if you say no when he wants it. Otherwise you should start thinking if he really is the guy that you want to go out with..
Hope this helps a bit, if you want to talk just message me on my profile ;)
~Carmen
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Rating: 5
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Haha, thanks, I'm glad someone can relate! 8D
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