about

Hey guys.

I'm just a girl going through the transition of a teenager to an adult and all that it entails.

I've had a colourful life with many a lesson learned and much to offer. Whether you want advice, support or just a chat then all you gotta do is reach out.

I'm honest, whether it hurts or not, but i'm fair; open minded and philosophical, a little crazy yet very logical, at times rather controversial.

If you have a question go ahead and ask!

advice

17/f

So I have this new boyfriend and things are great.
I was talking to my guy friend who I was sorta involved with before and we got into this argument because he hates the fact that I have a new boyfriend and stuff. It got to the point where he was telling me he cares about me more than any guy I date. This guy always pushed me to do more with him all the time, but I never wanted to have sex. I always told him that making out is as far as I'd go.
Well then he was like, "It's not my fault about everything that happened. You shouldn't have lead me on by making out with me."

I'm wondering if that's true that making out with a guy means that eventually there's gonna be more.
Like, I usually wouldn't have believed this but one of my last boyfriends almost raped me cause I didn't want to do more.
My guy friend who was all mad at me was saying that if I don't want a guy to push for more, don't make out with them.
I've already made out with my current boyfriend and it scares me that he's gonna push for more.

I'll probably end up talking to him about it later but what's your opinion? I know I have this guy friend who might just be jealous but is what he's saying true?

Making out with someone by no means gives the okay or expectation for anything more.
While it is true that kissing etc. can cause sexual arousal,it is nothing more than one of many physical expressions of mutual feelings between two people.
Your friend hadn't any right to expect anything more of you: you did not lead him on. It sounds as if he has feelings for you; this is evident in the way he treats your current partner, his disdain for any romantic partner that you should have, as well as his consistent self attribution whilst conversing with you.
You didn't reciprocate his feelings, you got a new man - he was probably hurt and reacted. It's important not to neglect friendships when you have a partner so find ways to reassure your friend and make some time for him.
Finally, when entering into a relationship it is important to be open from the beginning in many expectations you have of eachother, including sexually. You shouldn't be worrying that your partner will expect more of you until you are both ready. Talk to him about it and get his take on things, figure out where you both stand. He hasn't, thus far, pressured you in to anything.
Don't tar them all with the same brush. Have the conversations that you need to have. If you cant do that perhaps you need to reevaluate your choice in partner or whether you're ready for a relationship.
Again, I reiterate, kissing is NOT an invitation for sex if you don't want it to be. Just as a hug isn't an invitation for a kiss :)

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(Rating: 5) Thanks, this really does help
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