I am an advice hound. I love to give advice, get advice, read advice columns. I love telling people what to do ; D
Truly, I have a love for people and an honest desire to see every individual excel and succeed in their personal lives, to shed themselves of as many burdens as possible and enjoy this strange and terrible and wonderful gift that is LIFE
Location: Los Angeles
Occupation: advice guru and life coach
Member Since: June 9, 2009
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okay, so I just got engaged a few months ago to my boyfriend of now 7 years. A few days before we got engaged, Mike (my fiance) was on the road because of his job and I decided to surprise him for Valentine's day. I show up and find him passed out and half naked in bed at the hotel with some other half naked woman at the door. I find out he was drunk and never actually did anything.but after I found out and we talked about it, all was fine. Recently my best guy friend, Randy, told me that he has strong feels for me. He's always around when I need somebody and Mike is on the road and doesn't call much. Mike found out about Randy and I spending a lot of time together and got jealous. He then told me to choose between them. I got upset and walked off and disappeared for a week to clear my mind. in the heat of the moment I kissed Randy so now I'm really confused. When I was gone, only Randy called me and actually tried to find me while Mike hasn't done anything. He did and was as sweet as always and I'm starting to feel the same about him but still love Mike! I don't know what to do or who to choose! Mike is so sweet and romantic and everything I could ask for. Randy is sweet, sensitive and always there for me. Please help me. I'm getting Married in 2 months and need to figure out what to do!
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Girl, if you are having this much trouble before the wedding, being married is only going to magnify it by a thousand! You don't have to break off your engagement, but you need to postpone this wedding. It sounds to me like neither of you is completely ready to get married at this time. The incident with the naked woman is a huge red flag. I know you say you talked it out, but the fact that you are even mentioning it here means its not fine. You need to put this wedding on hold until you figure out what you really want. I can't say if your feelings for Randy are real, but at the very least what happened with him is a symptom of a relationship you are not sure about. Please, I know its difficult, but don't get married right now. Marriage is so very difficult even when you go into it with everything working. To have problems before you even take the vows... that's not going to end well. Take some time, let your guests know you've decided to postpone things, and really take time to think about this. don't let pride get in the way. Its better to break it off now then get married and realize you made a mistake. Divorce is a lot messier than simply canceling a wedding. Good luck to you.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you so much! I appreciate your advice! :D
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