Member Since: January 21, 2008
Answers: 32
Last Update: March 20, 2010
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stargirl51
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I don't even want to say I love him, but I think it's true. I don't want to think of him this way. He is my best friend. I can't tell anyone, "Hey, I lied I still like him. Hey, I'm not over him. Hey, I feel empty inside because he said he was going to love me forever, but he doesn't." I can not especially tell him. I told him a month ago that I would never mention "us" anymore, and I've kept to my word. By now he must believe that I am over him. I hope he does think that. But if he truly does, then it truly means he does not care and that he has moved on. It's so easy for him to mope about other girls and talk about them and me to give him advice, to cheer him on, to tell him to not give up. I tell him that he'll meet the right girl someday. I know that it isn't me. It can't be me right? If it was me, then he would know it. I have this break up book and have read some of it. I think it might have made my feelings resurface when I started reading it and actually feeling them again. I think I've tried to deny my feelings thinking that it's the easiest way to make them disappear. Life just changed on me so suddenly and I can't go back. How do I believe anything anymore? I know it was my fault but now I don't know how I'll trust a guy. It was bad enough before, it took me ages to open up to him properly, I'm scared. I'm scared that people lie and that love ends so suddenly without warning. And I thought everything was okay just yesterday. I don't know what to do. (link)
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There'll be times when your feelings will come back and something will trigger your memories and you'll feel the way you've felt like before. I know this from experience. But, you'll have to accept the fact that you may still like him and that you're scared because of your past experience with him. But you're just going to have to leave it in the past and move on. Just give yourself time to heal from your broken heart no matter how long that takes. I think the biggest mistake we make is denying the feelings, wishing they'd disappear but they won't. Accepting them and letting yourself heal will help you. Don't hold yourself back or punish yourself because you're scared of getting heart. We all want to be loved and sometimes, we have to learn it isn't always happy. What I thought was that maybe if I didn't care, I'd never be disappointed. But it'll teach you that there'll be more guys that aren't him, more guys who will not break your heart and love you and cherish you. You're never alone. Just remember that every broken heart is just another step to your true love. As you learn from your mistakes, you learn what perfect isn't and that'll lead you to your Mr. Right.
Good luck, hon!
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