I am a wife and a mother of three grown sons. I live in New York and am an equestrian. Most of my free time is spent riding and caring for my horses now that my sons are out of the house.
I give down to earth advice, as I tell it like I see it...and I've seen alot.
Gender: Female
Location: New York
Member Since: January 17, 2009
Answers: 281
Last Update: September 11, 2011
Visitors: 19516
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I've been talking to this guy since about November of 2008. He got out of a 2 year relationship in October of 2008 and the girl he was with used him and played games with him. I made the idiot mistake of sleeping with him when we last hung out in Nov. That is the only time we’ve hung out. The thing is that he texts me almost daily and always initiates these texts. Sometimes he flirts a little and seems to want to impress me by mentioning how he just got back from the gym and we joke a lot. He has never asked me if I would like to spend time with him and see a movie or something like that. After I slept with him I told him that I don't normally do that with guys and that basically I'm not a slut. He told me he didn't think that at all. I finally got the courage to tell him I like him in December and he responded with something like "You're a very nice girl but I'm not ready for a relationship at all."
I was hurt and left him alone but he hasn't stopped staying in contact with me. I don't get the feeling that he wants me just for sex because he's never hinted at it or asked me for it. He's a good guy. So after months of him not ever once asking to hang out I finally just brought it up because I'm tired of just texting. He said we could hang out one of these days when he is off since he works quite a bit. Does it seem like he likes me or just sees me as a friend? I get the feeling that if he saw me just as a friend he obviously wouldn't flirt, or ask for my opinion on certain things, or even text me so much every day. I'd ask him but I don't want to scare him off. If he doesn’t see me as more than a friend, then why would he text me so much? He will even message me on myspace just to say hi. I mean he knows that I like him so I don’t see why he would want to send me mixed signals if he just saw me as one of his buddies.
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He's being blunt with you about not being ready for a relationship. He got burned in the previous one and is probably unsure about jumping into another, so he's being cautious.
I do think he likes you, but, you must play it cool. Don't push yourself on him in anyway or that could turn him off completely. It sounds like he really likes you, but sleeping with him was a mistake. Put that behind you and take things real slow. When he's ready to "hang out" with you, he will bring it up. Don't take the initiative to contact him or tell him you like him. Leave things the way they are and wait and see if he makes the first move from here.
If he likes you he will make a move, after all, he knows, now, that you like him. If you're just friends in his eyes, then that will be obvious at some point.
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Rating: 5
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Very helpful, thank you so much! =]
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