Q: I'm 21/f, he's 23.
So, there's this guy. We dated for awhile, then "broke up" but didn't. He was a pretty awful boyfriend, but he's turned into my best friend. We went through a very rough patch, thanks to his family (they hate me), and I kicked him out of my life, kinda. After a week, he called me, begging for another chance (at being friends), which, after much discussing and debating, I gave him.
Since then, he's been the sweetest, most appreciative guy I've ever met. I thought I had begun to fall out of love with him, but now all those feelings are rushing back. He hugs me, he cuddles me, plays me love songs (he told me once that the music he listens to tends to reflect what he's feeling)...I feel safe and right in his arms.
I said we couldn't be as close as we had been, but I can't seem to keep my guard up now. We seem to be growing even closer than we were, and I'm...well, scared. I don't know if he's had some serious epiphany or what, but he's like a completely different person now...more like, he's turned back into the guy I fell in love with the first time.
I keep telling myself it won't last, but the thing is it has lasted. I'm afraid to take it for granted, and to let him in like I can feel myself doing.
What's worse is I don't know if it's me that's changed or him. I can't tell if I'm just handling things better, or he's giving me less to have to handle.
How do I keep my walls up? Do I need to keep my walls up? How do I figure out if it's me or him?
Thanks, everyone.
