Member Since: June 29, 2008
Answers: 23
Last Update: July 13, 2008
Visitors: 2453
|
| |
I am a 20years old female and come from a very religious family who believes that sex before marriage is a sin. All the women in my family were virgins until their wedding nights and the same is thought of me. My family is unaware that in my mid teen years I had been sexually active. I have not had sex in a while. I met this incredible guy who I love dearly and am serious about, and I want to have sex with.
I am deathly afraid of getting caught.
I can not decide between my family's happiness or my own. I feel like choosing my own would be selfish.
I have two scenarios. Either I have sex with the guy I deeply love, behind my family's back and their morals, and just pray I don't get caught
or pregnant.
Or I don't have sex with him in order to please my family's beliefs, and live the rest of my life heartbroken that I lost my love.
Please give me your honest opinion on what I should do. THANK YOU SO MUCH.
Also if you have time I have one more question. I've been on Lutera for almost 2months. I would like to know how effective birth control pills are if taken everyday at the same time? And do you know anyone who conceived a child while using birth control pills and were using them correctly as directed? (link)
|
Well, you CAN choose a different religion. Why should the decisions you make be all about what other people want? You are also over 18 now. They never have to find out! You can do whatever you want. You sound like a people-pleasing person. That's fine, but on this one, you should do what you feel like you should. You kinda answered your own question. "...and live the rest of my life heartbroken that I lost my love" You shouldn't have to lose your love. Do you still live at home? If so, just tell them you are going out, but really go to have sex with the guy. I know this may sound like bad advice to some, but I'm not advising an 11-year-old to have sex she's a freakin adult! I don't think that would be selfish as you sound very respectful of them, and in return, they should let you have this happiness.
Also, if you do decide to do this, most definately use a condom along with the birth control.
P.S. If I offended you I am terribly sorry. I was simply trying to give you my opinion.
|
|
Rating: 4
|
Thank you so much for your advice. This decision has been eating away at me forever now, and I really appreciate you acknowledging that I should have some happiness. I still don't know what I am going to do just yet. It could go either way because I always seem to have guilt trips when I do things behind my parents back even if the things I do are completely harmless.
But regardless your feedback brought me some sense of peace so thank you.
|
|