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About a month or two ago I made a promise to God that I would not masturbate until I turned 14. Several months ago, probably like 3 or 4 maybe 5, I turned 13. But, I broke that promise. And I know it's really bad to do that, and I'm a Catholic! But the really bad thing is, that I keep telling God I won't do it again, but I do! Sometimes when I cross my legs my clitoris throbs and it feels good, does that count? A part of me feels like he forgives me, partly because it was the time of my period when you're in heat, but part of me feels like he won't forgive me and I don't deserve to go to Heaven. I feel like I've broken my promise, God never breaks a promise and I feel unworthy. I talk to God a lot, I pray a lot, and praise him a lot. But sometimes I'm not nice to others like I should be. Like lying, or making fun of someone and not apologizing, although most of the time I do, yet I do it again! I truly, truly, truly need help to keep my promise and stay un-horny. Will I go to hell for this? Will he forgive me? I feel so scared, I want to go to Heaven! I worship God with all my heart, I really do. And I believe in Jesus and his commandments and in the beatitudes. But one night a while back, I wanted to sort of have my own way of getting an immediate answer with him. Years ago, I bought a statue of Jesus from Canada and the hands broke off accidentally. So I took one hand and fell alseep with it in my hand and asked him to have me wake up with it on the right side of my bed if the answer was "Yes, you will go to Heaven." and it go to the left side if the answer was no. It landed on the left side underneath me! I'm scared. I've done this before, and I asked him if I would meet my sisters in Heaven (I never met them) and it landed on the right side. Is this kind of witch craft or something? Well I'm really scared, so please answer this question! (link)
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Okay, first of all, I wouldn't go by the hand of the Jesus statue. I think it's just chance- don't try to make God answer right away. He will answer in His own good time. Just be patient. But, sometimes He won't answer if it it a selfish desire. Just do what you think is right.
If you made a promise to the Lord, you have to commit! He has held up His promises to you. Work at it! You CAN control your desires. The people who do are the ones who are truly great. IT is a habit and a hard one to break at that, but you can do it!
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