LadyH's

advice column

about

advice

so basically i got out of this relationship with this guy i was in love with i lost my virginity to him and everything. Now ive moved on to liking someone else well you see i figured out he liked me back which for awhile was great but then i just started to not be interested anymore because i went somewhere last night and there were a lot of good looking guy there. Now i duno but i am in fear of him asking me out, i guess it would only be fair to be completely honest with him. Another thing that worries me is my ex boyfriend before the one i was previously in a relationship still likes me(sorry so confusing) and now i feel it is affecting the guy i use to like and my previous ex boyfriends relationship bec. What should i do?

I can first say that it's completely normal to feel a little awkward after getting out of a [what seemed to be] serious relationship. Moving on isn't going to be easy & commitment to someone new might be a little scary. From what you said, you don't seem to know what you want or you're just not ready to jump into another relationship. & that's completely okay! If you are nervous this guy is going to ask you out, just let him know ahead of time that you aren't looking for a relationship right now. But why is it that you're not interested in him anymore? Is it the fear that things just might work out? Is it because you're scared to be happy & have a chance with love again? Or is it because you enjoy going after what you can't have & when you do have a chance with it, you don't want it anymore? Sometimes I think it's great to trust your first instinct. If you have no solid reason for a change of feelings (besides that there are plenty better looking guys in this world), give it a try. I know I did & I'm very happy with the relationship I am in now. Of course there are gonna be other guys who are more physically attractive. But if you like this guy for his personality, then that's all that should matter. Figure out what you want in a relationship. If he can offer what you want, take a chance. If you're not looking for anything right now, then enjoy the single life till you're ready & know what you want. :)

[view]