I'm the best at everything I do. Especially my girlfriend, she is better than all of you.
Gender: Male
Occupation: Full time student
Age: 16
Member Since: February 4, 2007
Answers: 49
Last Update: March 11, 2007
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so i wrote a story and i'm really interested to get some responses, if you don't like it don't try to be nice, just tell me.
It's supposed to be from the point of view of a seven year old girl, that's why it doesn't sound like the way you or i would think, i am just trying to get a child's point of view of a difficult situation.
also, please tell me if you understand the symbolism of the lion and the polar bear, if nobody understands it i will change it.
thanks! so muchhhh
http://storywrite.com/story/64143 (link)
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I thought it was a great story, pretty darn sad. The only thing that got me is that the narrator sounds younger than seven, maybe five or fourish. But hey, that's just me. Great story though.
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Rating: 5
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thanks, yeah, you're probably right, I was just going for some young kid's voice, i'll work on it thanks!
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