about

Hello All,
I am counsellor with over 12 years experience specializing in parenting, families, youth and mental health. I answer questions in a blunt and straightforward way so if you are looking for coddling or really touchy feely type advice thats not me I provide real solutions for your problems and concrete suggestions in other words I tell you the plain truth I don't sugarcoat.

I am really worried these days with the easy access to the internet and all the false information that is out there and the fact that people believe it!! So please ask first. I don't claim to have all the answers but I can claim that NOTHING will shock me you can try though :)

I look forward to hearing you thoughts and questions.

advice

I'm totally fed up of people borrowing money from me. My family gives me money to run the house and family(grandma, mother, brother).
My mother is #1 borrower. We have babysitter and she doesn't work but right now she owes me $1500! She doesn't even have the money to give me and I have about $300 to run the house for the rest of the month!
Then my friends they make me buy stuff saying they'll pay me back and they never do! I'm fed up and ready to take a stand.
HOW DO I GEt BACK THe MONEY from:
my mother &&&&
My friends?

Your first step needs to be to stop lending money to ANYONE! For your friends, if they need something and have no money and it is an absolute necessity then they have parents of their own they can ask or they can get a job. If they threaten you with the tired line of well then maybe you are not their friend point out that you are not willing to buy their friendship.

As for your mom, first off for this month when she needs something or if you have to make decsions as to how to spend your remaining money then you need to make sure that it is HER needs that are not being met, not yours or your grandmothers or your brothers. If she can't pay the babysitter then perhaps she needs to look after your brother. If she continues to bug you for money tell her that there is none and from now on if she needs so much money then she has a choice either get a job or get rid of the babysitter and look after your brother herself and then she can have that money, although why a mother would need to be paid to look after her child is beyond me.

You may never get the money back and the answer you are looking for is not in correcting the past its in protecting yourself in the future. I am unaware as to how old you are but this situation no matter your age is not a healthy one, you are the parent and your mother appears to be the child. I would really look into some of the free counselling in your area and address the real issues here you will see then that the issues around money will disappear.

Hope this helps.

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(Rating: 5) I'm 14. Thanks for the adivse. Yes it does seem the opposite//switchin roles. She made mistakes (money wise and men 'friend' wise) so that's y she's not to be trusted
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