about

I'm not going to sugarcoat anything for you. I'm going to give you advice that lets you know the reality of the situation. I'll make sure you know everything, the good and the bad. I'm here to target the reality, not the moral. I don't care about the "right" thing to do. I care about the "best" thing to do. Send me a question, and face the reality.

advice

I'm pretty sure you'll give me an honest answer, to this.
I'm 13, & All my friends are 13. I have to friends Christina & Shanice. Theres this boy named Zac who We all three like. Only me & shanice are keeping it a secrect from Christina. Because thats her boyfriend.(Were like not all three like bestfriends or a little circle group. or anything) But see I moved away, SO i don't go to school with them anymore..Me & shanice liked zac ever since last year & christina knows it, but assumed we were over him. Well tonight Christina had me & zac on 3 way and we were all talking like we used to and when he hanged up she said "I like zac likes you, but i got to call you tomorrow". She's unsure & confused if this kid really likes her, And i really don't believe she knows I wouldn't date zac or shanice wouldnt date him. I told her I wouldn't.
But truthfully, I still find him to be an amazingly good friend, a very cute guy, & I still do like him. Shanice knows this & agrees but she likes the idea better of me dating him (Or she says?) And Christina told me she seriously believes he likes me.
But my problem is, I would date/go out with him. If he asked. But I'm afraid of hurting feels. Sorry this is so long. :/

...so.. are you asking me whether you should date him if asks you? or whether you should believe what all your friends are telling you about him liking you?

well before I continue I'll say one important piece of advice. "read between the lines"

I'm serious. Friends are terrified of hurting each other. Some times they might be saying something just to be selfless. like how shanice says it's better with him dating you, think about it, why would she say that if she likes him?

Because she's being your friend and being polite in a way.

another check to reality for you, don't let all those assumptions and observations get to you head. I'm not being pessimistic, but in reality, you really can't judge from things your friends say. Though it may seem like he likes you from what all your friends say, it probably seems like it because you want him to like you.

from someone on the outside, they aren't so sure. I had a friend who strongly believed that this boy liked her, saying stuff like "he looked at her" and how he "seemed to look sad when she ignored him" but he was really popular and if he liked a girl he would've just went up and talked to her, not stare at her. He's not that type of guy, I've known him for 4 years. from me it was obvious but for her...let's say she was "blinded by love"

don't be blinded. Take a look and think, what are the REAL hints that he likes you? what are the REAL hints that he likes Christina or Stanice?

Also don't make a move on him if Christina's still dating him. and don't date him till at least a bit after they break up. Don't cause any hostility between you and your friends. Think about how much it must be hurting Christina because her boyfriend likes another girl, and her friend at that.

with a situation like this, I'm sorry to say it's almost impossible to not hurt any feelings. What happens next isn't necessarily your choice, but more like Zac's.

--therealist

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(Rating: 5) I thank, you alot.
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