About elipongo
I'm a single, Modern Orthodox, Jewish man.
I live in Ellington CT and I'm currently the Co-President of my synagogue, Congregation Knesseth Israel.
I work as a paramedic for the Ambulance Service of Manchester, a commercial ambulance service that does both emergencies and routine transports throughout the region.
In addition to my Paramedic License, I have a degree in Mechanical Engineering.
I enjoy Bicycling, Reading (Sci-Fi/Fantasy, Biographies, History), Blogging, Watching Movies on DVD (Yeah Netflix!), and meeting people.
I'm looking for that proverbial nice Jewish girl who isn't intimidated by someone who's observant. I want to settle down and raise a nice, observant family.
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Website: EliPongo's Blog
E-mail: elipongo@gmail.com
Gender: Male
Location: Ellington CT, USA
Occupation: Paramedic
Age: 36
ICQ: 2518839
AIM: elipongo
MSN: elipongo@hotmail.com
Member Since: July 20, 2006
Answers: 84
Last Update: April 28, 2011
Visitors: 9585
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the other week my boyfriend went all quiet for the day. i didnt think anything of it. then a couple of days later he told me that he was quiet because he was wondering if i was the right one for him. but then he said that he knows now that i am.
but today he went quiet again. i asked him what was up and he said 'nothing im just thinking.'
and so i said 'im scared now'... and he goes 'so am i'...
so obviously its scared the living day lights out of me. i love him 2 pieces and dont want to loose him.
i said to him ' i love you' and he usually says back. ' i love you too' but this time he said. ' i know you do'.....
just before he left he said 'dont worry.' cus he cud tell i wasnt right. and i said 'really' and he said yes. a few minuites later i told him that i was still well paranoid. and he said you should be.... but in a niceish way not as if he was trying 2 frighten me...
he still kept kissing me and hugging me and still said that he is coming over tomorrow. but i still feel really paranoid.
please say that is all it is i really dont want to loose him. he is the first person i have ever loved and i cant loose him. it would kill me.
please any help would be brilliant.
thank you.
Tread carefully here.
Your fear of losing him may make you try to *make* him love you. That won't work and may actually drive him away.
You can't make someone love you, it has to come from within themselves in response to the real you.
There's a saying that goes, "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was."
The proper course should be to tell him that you love him and that you hope he loves you too, but that you'll respect whatever decision he might make and you'll always remain his friend even if his love for you should fade.
If you're strong like that, it may very well re-affirm his love for you.
But if it doesn't, don't try to make him stay by threats of your misery or otherwise. You want him to stay out of love, not out of guilt.
You have my best wishes, because there are no easy answers for this kind of thing.
Hopefully its simply a case of moodiness that all us males experience at times. If you give him his space, it should all work out.
Be strong.
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(Rating: 5)
thank you. im trying to b stong. im not gona let him know how much it hurts. cus i have lost him. i lost him last night. he didnt think we clicked but he doesnt want 2 lose me completely. we r still friends. i will still hang around with him if i can. and i wont ever let him or n e 1 see my cry.
im so thankful for you advise. and i will take it. i do understand that no one can help how they feel and shouldnt be blamed for what they have done.
thank you
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